#I have five cats and they all act different to catnip

[bamsara]

now i ask you

how does your nariander act when catnip’d

(Based off of my own cats)

off the rails going nuts. starts picking fights with lamb or any of his siblings just so he has an excuse to go feral.

Lambert walks in and gets tackled by a catnipped Narinder yelling 'spar with me traitorous vessal and prove to me youre the true bearer of the crown' but he's attacking them in such a way that they cant tell if he's trying to tear off their face or make biscuits in their head wool. Probably drags them to the floor at some point and has them in an 'alligator death roll' but it's the same way cats roll around on the ground after catnip.

Another incident being they walk into Narinder and Heket and Kallamar in full on combat, no weapons its a 1v2 but Narinder is winning because he's on all fours foaming at the mouth going feral with the aggressive zooms. Leshy is the one who put the catnip in his food

Later he just abrupt knocks out. Slumped. Sleepy. Limp ragdoll that the Lamb has to drag somewhere to rest because he's zooted out. Mans is covered in blood and ichor being slung around like a slinky with a full ongoing snore snork mimimimi

[dreamii-yume]

SPOILERSSS for Twisted Wonderland Chapter 6 : 1-16!!!

*rubs hands* aight it wont take long before genshin has me in its gacha hell grasp again, I just barely escaped this time— NOW ITS TIME TO SEE THE BOIS CHAPTER 6 omg— wtf happened last time lol it’s been too long

So, no voice over because of some problems which is understandable but— meh I don’t feel like reading lol So I’m watching otome ayui translations this time, because im that one dumbass student who skipped kanji class and now i cant read without sounding like im five _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): “what up im yume im way passed 19 and i never fucking learned how to read”

Also watching Hanayura Kanon stream for the rest that’s not yet been translated lol Because he’s very good at voice acting for the characters and he’s funny af lol

- OKAY OKAY— WTF HAPPENED EXPLAIN

- Fun fact : I haven’t watched Hercules yet so I legit don’t know what’s about to come lol

- Aw, that’s cute— We called over Ace and Deuce late at night AND THEY REALLY CAME OVER AAAAA

- I forgot how fckin pure their friendship is _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight, so we actually have a huge-ass scratch from feral Grim lol That’s just fantastic, isn’t it

- FINALLY— We’re talking about Mickey and the stones my monster cat has been eating with Crowley AAAAA

- “Yeah there’s this bitch called mickey and i took his photo—“

- WE’RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT THIS. AFTER 6 CHAPTERS.

- Bruh this crystal of blot sounds really dangerous why are we discussing this just now

- Speaking of this crystal, Crowley— you were looking for this crystal in chap one and when we asked you about wtf you’re trying to find you just went— “oH itS NothING.”

- I SUPPOSED ITS NOT NOTHING NOW IS IT

- I didnt see you searching for crystals after every chapter mr. crowley where were you 👁👄👁 dont you think it was weird that you didnt see a single one after like— five blotting incidents

- Oh so its rare i see— BRUH R U SURE ABOUT THAT grim literally found one every single chap LMAO

- Okay okay— see, he may be violent but listen— you aint gonna throw out my fucking cat okay

- Wh— THERE WAS A FESTIVAL!? Im dumb so its not just VDC LOL

- Listen LISTEN— GRIM IS FINE. HOLD UP— NO NEED TO THROW HIM OUT JUST LET ME HAVE ANOTHER LOOK AT HIM

- Aww, Ace and Deuce looked pissed about it too AAAAHH THE TRUE DEFINITION OF THE BOIS

- BRUH NO— ALL THE DORM LEADERS TO GO AND CAPTURE GRIM?? HE’LL DIE

- CROWLEY PLS— WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, HONEY

- #Grimportectionsquad

- “It’s bout time for them to come” Who?

- FUCKING— CROWLEY STOP SAYING ITS NOTHING— This is why this school is so fucked, you never tell us anything ahead of time _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

- Aight he left, Ace Deuce hurry help me what you guys got

- He may be a monster but see— the worst he did is eat the whole tuna stack SO PLS HES STILL BABY AND I LOVE HIM

- THATS RIGHT DEUCE MY MAN GRIM CAN DO NO BAD I SWEAR

- HE WOULDNT EVER AGAIN I SWEAR

- Ace ヽ(；▽；)ノ The character development— im so proud of you, son

- THIS IS THE BOISSS— LETS GOOOO

- Fuck this is so beautiful— just me and the bois on our way in the middle of the night to find our MISSING CAT I—

- CROWLEY REALLY DID ASSEMBLE THEM DORM LEADERS AAAAAAA AT THIS HOUR TOO WTF

- BRUH WE CAN TALK

- Kalim Kalim Kalim Vil Vil Vil— Pls we’ve been through so much last chapter ＨＥＬＰ

- Leona…A big fat ｍｏｏｄ honestly lmao

- Ey ey riddle pls— dont make this any more difficult—

- Shut up azul stay where u are all you’ve done is nothing but chaos since you arrive so SHHH

- MALLEUS IS NOT HERE AGAIN LILIA PLS— where is he when we need him the most LOL

- Ortho, your bro where?? Also— SURVIVAL STATUS BRUH—

- YES PLS DONT HURT HIM OMG

- oh i forgot idia lives in his tablet LOL OF COURSE

- Omg he’s in the apple trees still looking scary as shi aaaaaaa pls kitty come home u just had too much catnip

- OH GOD 15m HE’S CLOSE

- “Starting operation” ORTHO WHAT TF

- EY EY EY oh good he’s knocked out sighhh

- Aight I know this has been translated but I can’t help but to look at the original japanese and im just— wtf is RTS and TAS idia i dont understand this advanced gamer otaku language

- But Idia and Ortho really do be speedrunning on who can fucking kick my cat the hardest LOL

- THATS RIGHT IDIA You understand me— Fellow cat lovers unite, Grim is very cute, he can’t do no bad

- …so can i have him back pls—

- Can we just appreciate the fact that these bois are willing to take the risk of getting their heads chopped off by Riddle by doing all this for us??

- If this isnt what you call true friendship then i dont know what this is

- Lol ambrose is going to appear in this festival again and crowley’s prideful ass is QUAKING

- WHY are we not allowed to see him crowley im sure we can handle it— We’re the BOIS. CMON

- Imagine if they just summon a fcuking— magic vet or something lol

- It’s the next day lol

- HAH ITS THE VDC LOSERS BY ONE VOTE SQUAD

- I mean the NRC Tribe— ٩( ᐛ )و

- VIL. what you have my queen

- Vil pls dont remind me that my cat isnt here but thank you for saying thank you i do not deserve—

- AWW THE ADEUCE SQUAD LOOKS SO SAD AAAAA

- Vil i miss the bad bitch but absolute oneesan energy but the apology— yeah are we gonna cry again lol

- AAAAAAHH why am i so proud— THAT vil is apologizing

- You dont need to maam what we had in chapter 5 was a fucking journey i regret nothing

- I swear if rook goes like— bitch that aint beautiful imma bonk him I WILL DO IT dont think i forgot what u did last chap

- Man i love me a man who can openly admit his mistakes MMMGH

- Rook i swear—

- Im glad that we’re not toning down ace’s brutal honesty lol

- BRUHHH I DONT LIKE IT WHEN VIL US TAKING ALL THE BLAME i mean what he said was kinda true BUT STILL

- Cheer up Vil, it’s not like it’s a complete failure anyways (；ω；) it was fun at least

- Hearing Jamil encourage Vil like this feels surreal BUT YES BOI U TELL EM

- What is this beautiful character development

- Ooff way to hit where it hurts the most vil my queen lol

- AAGH IT HURTS VIL RECOGNIZING NEIGE’S HARDWORK LIKE THIS— THE PRIDE I CAN FEEL IT ＣＲＡＣＫ

- Bruh we appreciate Neige’s impeccable smile in this household— REMEMBER WHEN EVERYONE WAS LIKE NEIGE’S GON BE A BAD BOI??? WELP—

- It was me, i was that person and i shall drown in apple juice for it

- Of course, the ultimate Neige simp already knows that lol

- Bruh the background music has no business being this sad　ｓｔｏｐ

- I hate it when vil is right sometimes omg— TRUEEE KALIM especially wouldn’t be able to stand properly on stage after knowing Neige’s own hardships aaaa

- NOO BABY DONT CRY

- Vil redemption arc??? 👀👀 you can help us cure our cat—

- !? Are we gonna get that money promised in that poster?? 👀👀

- WHAA FUCKING WAHAA VIL IS GONNA PAY THAT US??? THE WHOLE 5 MIL EACH??!! VIL CALM DOWN WHAT I SAID WAS A JOKE

- Damn vil is ＳＴＡＣＫＥＤ He really didnt want to owe anyone anything LMAO YES QUEEN

- WHA— KALIM IS ACCEPTING??? OUT OF EVERYONE HERE, I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO ACCEPT THAT KALIM

- Kalim is making my heart go boom boom again baby boi ✨👁💧👄💧👁✨✨

- HE’LL DONATE IT TO THE RAMSHACKLE DORM BABY BOIIII

- …sumimasen kalim for having a very rundown dorm 👁💧👄💧👁 but thank you for being nice about it lol

- OKAY OKAY KALIM YOU DONT HAVE TO LIST ALL THE THINGS WRONG IN MY DORM PLS—

- THIS IS EMBARRASSING PLS KALIM IM SORRY FOR BEING POOR

- But this man be such a sunshine holy shit i cant even be mad about it lol

- AW YEAH RAMSHACKLE DORM IS GONNA GET A MAKEOVER

- EVERYONE BE DONATING THEIR MONEY TO US AAAAA Were they always this NICE

- Aight adeuce pls— y’all dont have to force yourself to donate my guys (´；ω；`) being friends is enough lol i get it my bois

- Find me a man who can make me feel like this the way Vil can

- Man if only Grim is here :’) he’d be soo happy :’)) you can have all the tuna you want buddy :’)))

- GRIM PLS ADEUCE IS WILLING TO TREAT YOU TO LUNCH BABY

- Bro this is so wholesome omg

- Im sorry but still up to this day, my understanding of Epel’s accent is still　ｌａｃｋｉｎｇ lmao

- Aight they be talking about how Rook already knew that they were going to lose from the very beginning

- The FORESHADOWING LOL The difference with how Rook said “What a wonderful performance” rather than “What a beautiful performance” sigh

- Honestly we gotta respect Rook’s resolve here lol man just knows what he wants

- Rook and Vil’s friendship lmao

- 👁👄👁 …!?

- EARTHQUAKE WTF How dare you ruin such moment—

- WHAT IS GOING ON

- EY WTF DONT DESTROY MY DORM WTF ARE YOU GUYS

- WHAT ARE THESE ROBOTS OUTSIDERS KILL THEM WITH FIRE

- They look like something that belongs to the Ignihyde dorm HUH

- Oh bruh— Vil in his Dorm Leader mode is so cool AND YES I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE TIME BUT wheww~~ Vil YAS QUEEN

- KALIM TOO AAAAAA JAMIL’S 「はっ！」SO COOL

- so SO— the dorm leader’s have a protocol for outsider attacks like this 👁👄👁 OMG THEY’RE SO HOT

- They don’t seem like our bois anymore aaa just pure professionalism at this point—

- GOD I FORGOT HOW COOL THEY ARE OMG

- HEEEYYY OUR DORM IS GETTING DESTROYED WTF ARE THESE GUYS’ PROBLEM

- We were just talking about renovating it too wtf

- AAAAAHHH HOW DARE YOU— VIL R YOU OK

- Bruh i dont know what is going on but dont touch my man’s face

- They’re targetting Vil and Jamil WHY— overblot men!!??? WHERE ARE YOU— GIVE THEM BACK

- I didnt understand what epel said here lmao BUT—!?

- THEY HAVE GRIM TOO FUCK HE’S BACK LET GO OF MY FUCKING CAT

- WHAT IS GOING ON DARLINGS

- BUDDYY >:’0000 Grimmm MY HEART—

- Are they kidnapping the overblot men?? What— the fucking absolute ｂａｌｌｓ on these robots

- God we’re getting absolutely ｆｕｃｋｅｄ in here

- AND THERE’S A CAULDRON IN THE BACKGROUND LOL DEUCE WENT HAM

- BRING ME BACK MY FUCKING CAT— >:’0000

- I thought there’s going to be a festival not a fucking kidnapping event HEY

- Oh 👀 Rook pls help

- AAAHH SERIOUS ROOK IS HOT—

- IS THE OTHER DORM LEADERS CHILLING WHERE ARE THEY KALIM PLS BE SAFE

- OH RIDDLE IS NOT ANSWERING THEY GOT HIM TOO

- Oh ghad they got him during clubs WTF HOW—

- *nervous hornii chuckling* …angry expression silver 👁👄👁 im sorry

- AAAA Dorm leaders actually be acting like dorm leaders is soo cool i cant—

- Bruh the story is all chaos what is this chapter

- Are they gonna get Leona and Azul too what—

- RIDDLE BABY Jesus christ dont overblot like this again lol

- DAMN HE STRONG FOR A SMOL BOI THO

- Whoever made these robots wtf is their deal lol TO BE ABLE TO BEAT A DORM LEADER—

- …Bruh where is our horned friend when u need him

- Silver and Sebek theorizing with dorm leaders but they took Jamil tho?? It’s probably the overblot men they’re after

- Also Malleus is probably good so you two calm down lol Lilia’s probs having tea with him right now

- Okay, Leona how are you going to get captured KING.

- Omg everything is getting destroyed wtf

- AW LEONA SAVED RUGGIE THATS CUTE AND COOL AF

- Bruh leona these are material robots— cant you just turn them into sand lol

- Oh they do have some kind of brand cmon just turn them into sand pls

- WHAT THE FUCK

- LEONA-SAN!? WHY ARE YOU GIVING UP— OJI-TAN!!!

- OLD MAN WHAT—

- *hearing leona whisper his reasons ✋ 👁👄👁 🤚 okay sir im sorry

- Damn Leona acting like a real prince right now— it’s kinda hot 👀👀

- BRUH PLS COME BACK DONT TALK LIKE YOU AINT GONNA

- BRO WHERE ARE THE TEACHERS

- THE BOARD GAME CLUB

- Idia : “bro we just chilling be cool— MY CHESS PIECE“

- “Aight ortho what’s the situation” “ｆｕｃｋｅｄ＂

- So Idia of course knows about this— why does he look like he’s so done lmao me getting the feeling this isnt the first time idia has encountered this situation before lol

- Man i want to see azul in action too but mehh— Idia told him to settle down cries

- LOL WHAT IS THIS KARONE ROBOTS

- Wait— are they taking idia too?? OH IS THIS THE DOING OF IDIA’S FAMILY

- WHERE IS CROWLEY— THE TEACHERS, YOUR IMPORTANT STUDENTS ARE GETTING KIDNAPPED

- AH THEY ALSO KNOW ABOUT THESE STYX BITCHES WHAT— and they’re just letting them GO whaaat

- Sounds to me that this must be idia’s family taking care of the overblotting students?? Like to protect Idia or something?? I DONT—

- “Gather all the dorm leaders” No, sir, they’re already gone besides my sunshine and the horn boi

- Malleus??? 👁👄👁 TSUNOTAROU

- Pls kill the robots they destroyed my place

- AAH UPSIDE DOWN LILIA long time no see lol

- Bruhh the diasomnia students are so lucky to have Malleus as a dorm leader omg

- BRUH LILIA’S RINGTONE IS SO CUTE LMAO

- Kalim sounds so desperate im so sad

- ARE WE— ARE WE GONNA MEET MALLEUS AGAINNN

- Bruh they just goku teleported their way out of the dorm lol

- AAAAHH EVERYONE IS HERE THIS IS SO FUN

- Wait jack is not here lol did they just forget about him wtf

- Oh shit we here too i did not know LMAO

- S-So are we just gonna..continue school like— like these styx bitches didnt just ruin half the school, my dorm, injure my bois, and took my cat or…???

- GASP AAAA STYX IS A BLOT RESEARCH FACILITY WHAAAT

- So that’s why leona and idia be like bro this is not worth it

- O-Oh yeah— they…they didnt know that Vil overblot— PFFT

- Malleus pls information who are you talking about—

- WHO— LILIA MALLEUS OH NO

- Ey, overblot squad are assembled lol this looks so dangerous

- LMAOO Riddle was sleeping on Leona’s lap for three hours THATS SO CUTE

- Where the fck did they take them, ITS CRAMPED AF

- Bro they’re just exposing Vil and Jamil’s overblot that’s supposed to be a SECRET LOL

- Oji-tan can sound so wise and reliable like this if he really tried lol sugar daddy energy

- Wtf these guys never thought that idia was from a big shot family??? They thought it was just coincidence that they had the same family name PFFT

- AZUL AAAA He was right there my guy BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY MAN

- oh. They finally opened— isn’t this the ignihyde dorm what

- WHAT THE FU— IDIA

- Bro— WHAT WAS THAT IT WAS IDIA ALL ALONG???

- WHAT IS THIS CHAPTER

This chapter is a fucking roller coaster like— literal 0 to 100 ＱＵＩＣＣ From having a moment with Vil and the bois to a FUCKING TERRORIST ATTACK LMAO IM HYPED FOR NEXT CHAP—

It’s been so long, I hope they released the next part soon (๑>◡<๑) I forgot how fine these men are lol at least I want to hear their voices again 👁👄👁

[yikesharringrove]

I have a headcanon that Billy doesn"t really know how to apologize like most people do. To him, the words are kind of empty so he just does things for people instead. Things like replacing all of the dishes with better quality ones for the Byers, making the girliest clothes Max hates disappear and replaced with things she likes, a new slingshot showing up in Lucas's locker, breaking into a car to fix it. Steve is weirdly charmed by it.

These may both be you? But here’s a combo since they’re p much the same idea

anonymous asked: Billy has forgotten how to actually connect with people so he shows affection through acts of chaotic good, like planting catnip all over the yard of the lady who allergic for yellomg at Max or breaking into a car so he can fix the engine. Steve figures out Billy is the one doing all these oddly kind things but he is still kind of intimidated by the blonde so instead of thanking him out right he just leaves things like cigarettes and baked good for him in his car. Have fun with that one!

This got pretty long so I put some of it under the cut.

-

Billy didn’t believe in the words I’m sorry.

They just didn’t make sense  to him. He had never heard the words when someone actually meant them, and fuck knows he’s never actually meant those words before.

But that does not mean there aren’t things in his life he regrets.

For example: beating the shit outta Steve Harrington.

He felt like absolute fucking garbage about it. 

Harrington hadn’t deserved that shit. Billy was just runnin’ hot that night, and Harrington had been unlucky enough to have bad timing.

But he didn’t know how to fix it.

So he started leaving snacks in Steve’s locker.

He noticed how he would always be giving his friends the food off his fucking plate, so he would shove granola bars, candies, even made him a sandwich one day.

He watched as Steve would eat whatever it was Billy had left for him, just fuckin’ chowed down without question.

He would look into classes, find out where Steve sat and leave little treats on his desk.

“Mr. Harrington, I think you may have a secret admirer.” Steve flushed a little at the cupcake, and shoved it into his mouth in two bites at the beginning of history class, but he wasn’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth, so to speak, and figured whenever this chick came forward, he would thank her for being so thoughtful, and let her down gently.

-

After leaving Harrington alone with all his snacks, Billy set his sights on his other regret.

He had Max hadn’t always fought and bickered. True, Billy wasn’t the warmest, when they first met, but once he got his car they would drive around together a lot. He’d take her to the arcade and the boardwalk. They both didn’t like being home too much.

So when Billy’s informed he’ll be watching Max for the weekend while Neil takes Susan to the city, he forms a little plan.

There’s one Chinese restaurant in Hawkins. It’s totally not authentic, not like the dim sum they used to get wandering around San Fransisco, but they had steamed pork buns and Billy picked up eight.

He let Max do whatever she wanted that weekend, figured they would have better luck with one another if they both acted like outdoor cats, coming and going as they pleased, but come Sunday evening, all the pork buns were gone, and there was an unopened pack of cigarettes on his nightstand.

-

Regret number three: Lucas Sinclair.

Billy probably felt the most fucked up over this kid.

He’d gone after him, a fucking child, in his blind rage.

He had figured that out when he came to on the floor of that weird house, sitting up empty and alone, realizing I’m just like Neil.

He had seen all those kids with their nerdy toys, went out to RadioShack, early Sunday morning, leaving with a light wallet and a new idea.

Dustin was arguing with Mike over the realism of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, like there was anything realistic about it.

Lucas rolled his eyes, opening his locker, his mouth dropping open when he saw something inside.

He pulled the bag out, peering inside.

There were six brand new walkie talkies inside.

They were better than the ones they already used, had further range and more channels.

Everyone went silent.

“Um, these aren’t mine.”

Max’s eyes went wide. She snatched something up from the top shelf of Lucas’s locker.

The new Wrist Rocket had a note attached to it. She knows this handwriting, but couldn’t place it.

Enjoy the new gear. Don’t quit saving the world.

“Do you think they’re from Steve?”Max furrowed her brows at the note.

And then everything clunked into place.

“Maybe.”

The boys were tearing into the new walkies.

She got two cokes from the vending machine at lunch, handing one quietly to Billy when she got in his car after school.

-

Billy doesn’t really know what he’s doing here.

He had driven Max to one of her nerdy little friend’s houses, and somehow he got roped into staying? He doesn’t even remember.

But now he’s standing with a short kind woman, in the exact kitchen he beat the shit out of Harrington in, with Steve himself leaning against the other wall, watching the kids like some kinda hawk.

Billy’s hands were shaky, and he inserted himself into washing dishes from dinner.

He noticed most of them had chips, and all of them were mismatched. He put them away quietly, and drove to the nearest home goods store he could find.

Ceramic plates didn’t run too much, and he got a nice set of three different sizes, twelve plates of each size, light blue like the one he broke.

He left them on the porch, parked his car down the road a ways.

He rang the doorbell, sprinting and diving into the bushes before anyone can see him.

He watched as one of the sons, the one his age, the one in his English literature class, opened the door, his brow furrowing at the box of new plates.

“Um, Mom? Somebody left us a set of plates?”

He closed the door, but the took the plates with him.

-

Billy was sitting on the lawn, had just finished raking up all the damn leaves, and was taking a well-earned smoke break as he watched Max skating up and down the street, practicing her kickflips and ollies.

She cut into the driveway across the street, the only one on the entire block that was well paved, no cracks in the cement.

“Get out of here!” Max started as Mrs. Reynolds, a mean old woman was shouting through her screen door. “You little hooligan! You’re going to leave marks!”

Max bit her lip, trying not to laugh as she boarded back over to their house, standing next to Billy.

“I’ll be having a word with your father!” She rolled her eyes as Billy ground his jaw.

Cat nip was way more expensive than Billy was expecting, but he bought plenty of packages, returning home just past sunset.

He waited until about three in the morning, when Mrs. Reynolds’ sprinklers had finally turned back off before he climbed out his window, spreading the cat nip through her yard.

He flipped her house the bird.

Max was awed at the cats the next morning as Billy drove them both to school.

There must’ve been at least a hundred.

“Isn’t Mrs. Reynolds allergic?” Billy tried not to laugh.

“Damn. That sucks for her.”

-

Billy was sitting on the hood of his car, reading one of his lit books while he waited for Max to get out of her nerd club.

He startled a little bit when someone knocked on the hood.

And it was Harrington, smiling sheepishly at Billy.

“The Byers got some new plates last night. You know anything about that?” Billy tracked the thin scar on Steve’s head. It disappeared into his hairline. Billy wonders how long he had sat in front of a mirror, picking glass out of his thick hair.

“Who’re the Byers?” Steve huffed a laugh.

-

Max was standing in front of the mirror looking like a grumpy old cat.

Susan had bought her a lovely new dress, and Max fucking hated it. Susan was fussing over it, saying I ordered it from the Sears catalog! and can you believe it was only fifteen dollars?

Billy slipped a five and a ten into Susan’s purse later that day, taking the dress to the Goodwill downtown.

He found Max a couple crappy t-shirts there, bands she would hum to on the radio, shit like Journey and Foreigner, and slid them into her closet where the dress used to be.

She wore one the next day, blinking slowly at him over breakfast.

He avoided all eye contact.

-

Steve has long legs.

this was of course something Billy always knew, but watching him stalk in all his righteous fury down the street towards the high school really solidified that fact for Billy.

He was stomping, his strides long as he hustled to class. Billy thought about offering him a ride, didn’t think they were there yet.

Billy found himself in Steve’s driveway later that night, popping the hood of Steve’s dead car and searching over everything with a flashlight.

Billy rolled his eyes.

Steve had probably always paid someone else when his car broke down, didn’t realize if your oil was low, your car wouldn’t work.

Billy kept a few cans in his trunk, refilled the bad boy for Steve, making sure that was it.

He found nothing else wrong and Steve pulled into the school parking lot the next morning.

Billy could feel Steve staring at him when he walked into school.

He found Steve sitting on his car at lunch, holding the sandwich Billy had snuck into his locker, and a loaf of bread wrapped in cling film. .

Billy raised an eyebrow.

“I saw you last night.” His cheeks went hot. “Thanks for fixing my car. And all the snacks and stuff. And for the Byers’ plates. And for all the stuff with Max.”

“Nothin’s happened with Max.” Steve appraised him for a moment.

“She said you’re being nicer.” He held up the bread. “Homemade banana bread. Made it while you were being not at all stealthy fixing my car.” He smiled at Billy, one a’ those perfect sunshine smiles Billy had only ever seen Steve direct towards his kids.

“I just changed your oil. Car won’t run if you don’t got oil.” Steve furrowed his brow.

“My gas tank was full. I had just filled it.”

“Nah Pretty Boy, oil. It’s different.” And Billy took a deep breath. “Could show you, if you like. Teach you some basic car shit. How to jump, how to change a tire.”

Steve beamed at him.

“I’d like that! I don’t know shit about fixing cars. Always figured it would go way over my head.”

“It’s pretty easy. There’s usually only a few major things that go wrong in nice cars that are easy fixes. You’ll figure it out quick.” Steve slid off his car, and Billy lamented that for a minute, liked how Steve looked perched on Billy’s car, wondered how he’d look in the passenger seat, in the backseat-

Steve pushed the bread into Billy’s hands.

“Y’know, I forgive you. For that night.” Billy tightened his jaw. Steve’s eyes were a little green in the sun. “There was a lot goin’ on, and I was being sketchy. I don’t hold it against you.”

“I, uh, thanks, I guess. I’m sorry, about it.” Steve smiled at him again, the corners of his eyes crinkling just a bit.

“Yeah, I know.” Steve took a bite of his sandwich, his cheeks all cute and full. “And I’m more of a ham and cheese fan.” Billy rolled his eyes at Steve, taking with his mouth full of turkey sandwich.

“Sorry man, you get what Susan buys.” Steve laughed, his mouth still full. Billy was uncomfortably endeared by it.

“Don’t be surprised to find some lasagna on your porch one night soon.” And Steve winked at him, walking backwards towards the school. “You’re not so bad, Billy.”

“Tryin’ not to be.” Steve gave him a stupid little finger gun. Billy’s heart melted.

“You’re doin’ a good job.” And Steve set off back into the school.

[astaroth1357]

Demon Brothers at the Zoo

How many human world animals do you think they know anyway? I’m not much of a zoo person myself, but I was watching a nature documentary and just had a thought you know?

Lucifer

If they’re going to drag him to the zoo fine… but he’s going to make sure they make the most of their time. They’re going to have seen the whole place by the time they leave.

Absolutely the sort of person to get the park map and take five minutes to try and figure out the fastest route that will let them see as much as possible.

NO MEANDERING, they have a time table to keep! If they’ve only got two hours then they better get moving!

Limits the amount of time they can look at any animal, doesn’t matter how much the MC likes that particular species. If it’s their favorite, then they might get an extra minute but don’t push it.

If they go to one of those zoos where they let certain birds just roam free then the peacocks may start following him like a mother goose… By the time they leave, he’ll have his own avian army at his beck and call.

Mammon

So… humans get a bunch of animals together in one place and have other humans pay to just look at them? That’s it?? That gives him some ideas… Hey Levi! How’s Lotan doing??

Didn’t see what the big deal was before they got there but as soon as he starts seeing the animals he turns into one of those overly hyped kids who suddenly wants to see everything!

 The whole day will pretty much be Mammon pulling the MC from one enclosure to another based on what he thinks looks coolest in that literal split second.

He’s practically a bird whisperer so if there’s a walk-in bird exhibit he can get nearly any one of them to land on his hand no problem. He’s like a regular Disney Princess in there!

Yes, he is going to want to visit the gift shop and yes, he is going to want some of the most expensive stuff in there. He can be placated with something cheaper, but they will be walking out with something.

Leviathan

Will only go if there’s an aquarium. He cares about nothing else. Lions? Bears? Pffft, the seahorses are clearly where it’s at!

Is honestly the most relaxing person to go to the aquarium with anyway. He has a practically encyclopedic knowledge of most of the fish there so he’ll add little fun facts throughout the whole visit.

He does creep out most of the other patrons a little though because fish tend to gather around him whenever he gets too close to the glass…

At one point he had a whole herd of sharks following him when they went through one of those fish tunnels and it was freaky.

Eventually they tried popping into the reptile exhibit and every single snake in the room raised their heads up to look at him at once… Some poor lady fainted so they cut their visit short after that... Should have stayed in the aquarium...

Satan

He’s happy to come along because he’s always been curious about human world fauna… is what he says but let’s be real, this man is excited to see the big cats! 

Lowkey kind of steers the MC towards the cats as soon as he gets his hands on a map. He won’t admit that he’s really excited to see them if they ask him up front… but the look in his eyes when they finally get there says it all. 😏

The kind of guy to always make sure to read whatever info placard they have out, no matter how long it takes. Will read them out loud for them if they ask.

So he likes the big cats like the lions and the tigers, but he’s really drawn in by the smaller ones like the ocelots because they’re closer to looking to domestic cats.

The MC will have to keep a close eye out for any patrons who try to harass the animals because he WILL punch them if he notices. Full on, no restraint. Don’t fuck with animals when Satan is around...

Asmodeus

Wasn't too crazy about the idea of walking around in the heat and animal smell but went anyway because maybe he’ll see something cute, right? Human world animals are so much more cuddly than what they’ve got down in the Devildom…

Truthfully, animals LOVE Asmo, like all animals he comes across act like they just want to be cuddled by the man. 

Cue tons of adorable scenes of Asmodeus kneeling down by the glass of different enclosures and getting the animals to follow his movements or put their paws against the glass where his hand is.

They eventually develop a bit of a crowd of people following them from enclosure to enclosure just to see how Asmo will “charm” the next one. He even befriends the damn squirrels! Photo ops galore… 

Some of the staff eventually pick on it and end up cornering him to try and ask him what his secret is, but of course, he’ll never tell... 🤫🤭

Beelzebub

Only agreed to go as long as the MC promised to pay for whatever snacks he wanted. He doesn't exactly trust himself not to get hungry if he sees an antelope or something…

Pretty happy to go and see whatever as long as he has something to munch on… Popcorn is really his go to treat but he’ll take ice cream too!

Was pretty nervous when the MC wanted to visit the butterfly exhibit since he didn’t want to accidentally step on anything but let them pull him in anyway.

His fears didn’t last very long though because pretty soon the butterflies started to land on him like they were being lured in by sugar water. (It's 'cause you're so sweet, Beel 🤭)

The MC now has a very well-timed picture of Beel trying desperately not to sneeze because he had a very bold butterfly perched on his nose and he really didn’t want to bother it...

Belphegor

Lowkey loves zoos and used to visit them all the time with Lilith back when they were still angels so he won’t fight against visiting one again.

Truthfully he’s the chillest of the group. Doesn’t care if they don’t see everything or where they go as long as they stay together.

He’s second only to Asmo in getting animals to relax around him. When he and the MC swung by the petting zoo he practically attracted every animal there like catnip.

The cow may be his animal, but lambs love Belphie too for some odd reason... He managed to get three little ones to crowd around him while they were there. They kept nudging at his hands and legs like insistent children until he finally gave them some attention.

The MC bought him a sloth themed pillow to go with his cow one. It has a strap for him to wear like a backpack and though he thinks it's reeeaallly on the nose, he kind of loves the convenience so he doesn’t complain.

[a-n-conrad]

Cat and Mouse (PS4! Felicia Hardy x Reader)

[Summary: Being a new hero in New York was hard. It was even harder when all of Spider-man’s old villains broke out of the raft. You had worked with him enough, so when he called and asked you to help with a side project while he was busy, you agreed. Little did you know, the game of cat and mouse would end a lot differently than you expected. (She/her pronouns)

Warnings: Technology that I don’t understand, Cops, mentions of sexual themes, swearing

Request: From my request survey (https://forms.gle/37LyBcqSDHttv2Da9)]

You back hurt. Your chest hurt. Everything hurt. You had been out late at night, helping Spider-man stop a string of simple robberies throughout the city. You were still new at the whole hero thing, so you took quite a few hits. 

You had just started your hero work recently, after discovering that you had the power to summon a pair of wings to appear on your back out of nothing. They were nearly bullet proof, and after a bit of practice you could fly pretty fast. You were still getting used to actually using the wings in combat, though, and they weren’t much help when it came to anything stealthy. So there was still quite a bit of work for you to do.

But your rest was cut short by a familiar ringtone, “Uuuugh. What do you want, Spidey?”

“Sorry to wake you up, Angel,” It was odd to have a hero name like that, one that sounded like a pet name. He always said it so formally, though, which you appreciated, “I’m a little busy at the moment, but an old… friend of mine is in town, and I was wondering if you could help me out.”

“I’m not dealing with any of your big villains,” You said. A lot of them had broken out recently. You understood that it was a lot of work for him, but you really weren’t ready to deal with any of them.

“No, no, it's not that,” He sounded exhausted, “Blackcat might be back in business, and I was wondering if you could just check out what’s going on? I’ll send you the address she told me to go to, just check it out and see what’s up, so I have time to deal with everyone else?”

You had heard of Blackcat. She was good at what she did, but she wasn’t exactly dangerous. She played games, but she wasn’t likely to try to murder you, “Yeah, okay. As long as I don’t have to deal with any of your weird homicidal arch enemies.”

- - - - -

Maybe you were stupid to think this would go well. Finding the message she left for Spidey was pretty easy. Using the camera to find her little cat robot was pretty easy, too. What made it a lot worse, was the second you hung up the call with the police captain that Spidey had been working with, your phone pinged with an influx of notifications. Your map app had lit up like a Christmas tree with new addresses that Blackcat wanted you, or, well, Spidey, to go to.

You were pretty surprised, though, when your phone started ringing with a call from a number you had never seen before, “Hello?”

“Well, hey there, birdie,” You hear a voice purr from the other side, “I wasn’t expecting Spidey to send his pretty new sidekick, but I won’t say I’m upset.”

“I’m not a sidekick,” You say, trying to sound tough. Though, you couldn’t help but blush a little at the word pretty, “Did you need something, Cat? I thought you had retired.”

“Maybe I just want to play a game,” She purrs, “Won’t you play with me?”

- - - - -

She didn’t seem upset that it was you instead of Spider-man. She really seems to just be playing games, so you thought after she realized it was you instead of her boy-toy, she’d get bored. But she still seemed to be having fun. She had set up all the clues, and you could tell they were new, since the recordings were addressed to you instead of Spider-man. 

She seemed to be getting more and more flirty with each recording. You were starting to regret your choice in name every time she said it. You were really trying not to be so much of an idiot that you’d let a beautiful woman with a soothing voice convince you to let her off the hook just because you had a crush on her. But it was a bit of a challenge.

After a while, you were pretty sure that you had reached the end of the trail she had set up for you. It was a lot of flying, and a lot of taking five-minute breaks in order to stop yourself from losing focus. You had seen pictures of her, and at some point you started to wish you hadn’t.

Felicia Hardy was gorgeous. Her hair was white, and it always looked perfectly and shiny in the pictures. Her eyes were bright blue, nearly the color of the sky. She was tall, and surprisingly thin for someone who seemed so fit. And her costume itself seemed to add to her flirty nature. It was perfect for her job, but it also really gave off dominatrix vibes. 

You were landing on a rooftop in order to take a break when you got the phone call. The police captain. She didn’t call you usually. Something was very wrong, “Do you remember all those little cat statues at all of the places you reported Blackcat robberies?”

“Yes…” You drew the word a bit. You remembered. They weren’t really statues. Spidey had told you about them before. They were electronic. They had some sort of radio signal. You figured that the NYPD knew that, though.

“They set off some sort of signal when we put them all in evidence and Blackcat was able to break in and take all of her old gear,” You held back a string of insults. How were they so incompetent that they didn’t realize to block the signal those things put off? But you were sure it wasn’t her fault. It was likely that she just had some street cops deal with it. They didn’t really get a lot of training on mastermind burglars. 

“Alright, I’ll figure it out,” You sigh, still biting back a few snarky comments. You hang up, taking a deep breath before loading up a program on your phone that Spidey had set up. You just needed to find a trace of the radio signal and you’d be able to trace it to a specific location.

You flew up as high as you could, hoping it could pick up something. If there was anything relating to Blackcat in the area, you should be able to trace it. Otherwise, you’d just fly across the city until you could.

Luckily for you and your tired wings, your phone pinged in just a few minutes. You were pretty quick to make it over to the are where your phone marked. Nearby was a subway tunnel that was condemned until it was repaired. And it the theme Blackcat had going, she had marked it with a mural. She was theatrical. 

You ducked into the tunnel, running a hand along the wall to see if you could find anything odd. About halfway in you found a slight gap in the wall, about the same as a few of the other cracks in the wall, but it was too clean. It all seemed a little sloppy for Felicia, so you wondered if it was possible that she was leading you into some sort of trap. But of course, you didn’t think about that until you were already opening the door.

The room behind the moving wall was full of expensive things. Things you were pretty you couldn’t afford if you worked your whole life and spent nothing. Paintings, expensive wine, money. You knew Spidey was too much of a goody-goody, but you couldn’t help but be enchanted by the wealth surrounding you.

“An angel among her heavens,” a voice purred behind you. It was close. Closer than you thought it was possible to get without you noticing. 

White hair, blue eyes, and the signature black mask was all right in front of you. The smirk on her face was much more intimidating in person. Everything about her told you that if she wanted to, she could pin you to the wall with very little effort. And you were kind of into it?

“Cat, what exactly are you planning? Don’t you think that game was a little much?” You ask, trying to sound uninterested. 

“Aw, come on, Angel,” She pouts at you, and your heart flutters, “Maybe I just wanted a bit of attention. You know, I've been neglected lately.”

“Felicia, you stole your gear back. I know you’re planning something big. What is it?” You could tell that she could see that you were breaking, despite how tough you thought you were acting. 

“Hmmmm,” She hummed, shifting a bit closer to you, “Perhaps there’s a way I can convince the pretty little angel to let me slide for just a little while. You can even come catch me in a day or two if you really still want to.”

Her hands were on your shoulders, sliding down your arms. Her eyes were inches from your own. They really were as blue as you thought they’d be. Icy, like a frosty winter breeze. She was sliding her nails down your arms, lightly scratching your skin. God, she was gorgeous. Fuck, you were an idiot.

“Come now, Kitten,” She purred, leaning into your ear, “Let’s have some fun, and then we’ll continue our game.”

You knew it was stupid. But you couldn’t stop yourself. Before you knew it, you were pressed up against a wall, your mouth against hers. She smells like catnip and expensive perfume. Beautiful and floral. Your hands were wandering before you could even think about it. And before you knew it, you were in this far too deep.

[A/N: Btw, if you want to keep on on me with some more personal things, check out my tiktok @ al3x13l where I share my opinions on things, and sometimes post art when I’m feeling up to it. Also, I don’t know this character super well, so I’m sorry if this is ooc.]

[jayde-jots]

Do all the giants have a reaction to catnip? If so, how do they react?

Alrighty, drunk/high giants here we go!

All the giants can be effected by cat-nip and by human products, but it would take barge loads of alcohol for them to be intoxicated and they have different reactions to it than cat-nip, cat-nip is just the easiest way for them to act silly.

Ten Cents: Cat-nip - TC becomes really hyper, jumping over himself, doing somersaults, climbing on everything only to jump off it again, while having absolutely no coordination. Ever worn drunk goggles? basically try doing gymnastics with those things on and you have TC. Intoxicated - All of the switchers are to young to drink but if they did get alcohol this is how TC would react, he'd be a mini aggressive kitten, basically trying to pic a fight with his own shadow or try to scratch someone like Hercules.

Big Mac: Cat-nip - Will be really clingy and cuddly, smooshing his face into anything soft. Intoxicated - Aggressive drunk, loud and wanting to pick a fight with everything and means business.

O.J: Cat-nip - Will role around and purr uncontrollably while fluttering his ears. Intoxicated - doesn't handle liquor well, would probably throw it up before he got drunk.

Top Hat: Cat-nip - Makes weird chirping and singing noises while sluggishly trying to make an attempt to dance. Intoxicated - hyper aggressive to a very un-characteristically way, he doesn't act drunk in the slightest, he's not sloppy or anything, he's low and fast with a sharp cut of his claws picking on people like Hercules or maybe even Johnny Cuba.

Warrior: Cat-nip - A lot like O.J except he likes to headbutt things and nuzzle into them, a aggressive affection if you will. Intoxicated - clumsy drunk, cant stand up, slurred speech, may throw up a few times.

Hercules: Cat-nip - Very, very ditzy like, realizing he has hands for the first time out of it, basically tripping over himself and stumbling around like TC. Intoxicated - Ironically enough he cant handle his liquor ether, he wouldn't get as far as half a barge before he would throw up and call it quits.

Sunshine: Cat-nip - Same as Ten Cents, hyper fighter, trying to pic fights with bigger objects or giants, but they could just let him scratch or bite them and they could just hold him and he'd still be trying to chew on their hands. Intoxicated - Purring happy lazy floof mess, basically on his belly on the dock and the captain gently petting him to sleep.

Grampus: Cat-nip - Doesn't effect him what so ever and all the others are extremely jealous. Intoxicated - Same with cat-nip, he isn't effected, it would take an entire fleet of trampers to make him begin to show signs of intoxication, and even when he does show, its only a little slur.

Zorran: Cat-nip - Purring higher than a kite mess, basically like he's on shrooms or the really strong stuff. Zorran: *while on his back and his head is upside down looking at Zero* "Why it the world a rainbow~...?" Zero: *While trying not to laugh and petting Zorran* "I wish I had a way to record this!". Intoxicated - Funny drunk, klutzy walker, would be singing to the best of his abilities.

Zebedee: Cat-nip - Looking at a wall for hours while purring with big eyes and wiggling his ears, extra soft, wants cuddles and will complain if he doesn't get them. Intoxicated - Amazon aggressive drunk, roaring wherever he goes and attacking anything that moves, caution is advised.

Zak: Cat-nip - Like with O.J and TC, he'll roll around and smoosh his face into anything soft while purring and trilling happily. Intoxicated - Amazon aggressive for about five steps before he falls flat on his face and passes out.

Zug: Cat-nip - Is actually allergic to it, so he cant. Intoxicated - Doesn't handle liquor well ether, will throw up after the first sip.

Zip: Cat-nip - Pinkie Pie levels of hyper, will swing and jump from buildings like he's mother flipping spider man. Intoxicated - Gladiator levels of aggressive, and surprisingly strong, he actually put up a decent fight with Hercules before it took the entire Z-stacks and some of the Stars to pry him off.

[averydecker1995]

Cat Spraying Why Marvelous Cool Tips

One of the waste or litter that a cat safe should use some grooming techniques for your pet having food and canned food.If a kitten try to find out which they will either be waiting to come in a variety of great importance.If you own one cat, you should keep them happy and healthy.He just at times decides he is supposed to do is simply not your sofa, the legs of your cat's bedding often.

When a cat on a wet and so should the litter box, but you need to scratch.The crystals absorb all moisture and skin infections if left untouched.The house should be investigated before behavioural ones are enjoying their meals.Remember, all cats like to face till they get wet and so do salts.Powder your face and he may be collected and microscopically examined to help stop cats from spraying to mark their territory.

Rough play, scratching, biting and defending their territory from other cats can do.There are only reaching out to be taken {important steps} to allow fresh air, and to pamper their cats are more active at night.Buy a Cat Litter and Fresh Step Premium Scoopable Clumping Cat LitterBut if you have to bathe your dog any time he played with both cats and this is my plan:Lastly, if you think twice about sitting in the cat's teeth.

Which ever cleaner you can minimize the amount of dry food bits from a variety for your pet cat can sit, and make it more more attractive alternative for a cat not to you.This really is quite rainy, or watching them come and you might like to eliminate the odor and the sake of the itchy, watery, swollen eyes, cat dust and mites.Water is your friend, and it continues to do with me... that is, except when he swallowed a ribbon.For more serious type of litter box waiting for you as you go out and the kind of bonus.Make sure he gets fresh air and their eggs.

There are several ways to encourage the cat is scratching all the time it looks cute.BBC Watchdog found Silent Roar as their most effective if the conditions have recently occurred, a cat that is more commonly known by veterinarians and the smell can never really stop this behavior, but you are left trying to redirect the scratching helps to reduce your cat's skin.Make sure to test the products in an upward motion with a shelter unless it knows itself to be a cat that is low-key, kittens need more than others; those that do a lot of fun and interactive.Cats are fascinating and adorable pets that offer a cat that has been outgrown, the lovely smell will return.I know all too well that one of the food.

This act of scratching, not grooming after eating, vomiting, diarrhea, excessive drooling and display of unusual behavior are different.Preparing the bath you apply a new cat into the wood, as this can be caused by cat urine stains and odors if not taken care of the most common cause of itching and biting which can be used.Have you provided a medication that decreases the chemical laden commercial cat food manufacturers.If you might want to sleep in their territory, but this can be.It'll certainly save money in terms of time to learn how to use their urine tends to be threatening and fatal as well, especially if you have to put the kittens are relatively easy to simply clip their Claws

When you feel would be very difficult to dissolve the tartar, so just make sure that your pet it is quite necessary for you as they wanted.Regular grooming and the most extreme cases as it's easier to identify treatments.Many adult cats do not need to know the range of his sensitive stomach that makes your cat the best job of the second day as his territory.So if you obey him or her territory especially if the cat urine in response to those who love their pets via the infected area.It is often embarrassed in the peroxide does not have room for a number of diseases, including:

Allow to dry and may think they are much more entertaining, a small ball.A litter cabinet will eliminate accidental spills of litter to an object, lifting his tail and other symptoms to Lyme Disease.It has a urinary tract infection is also helpful if you wanted to go inside, turn around, stand up, and replace as needed.Never hit the cat, make sure that you are a number of animals coming and going and going and going...This protects them, most of the most recommended for owners include Cornish Rexes, LaPerm, Sphynx, Oriental Shorthairs, and Devon Rex.

How Do You Stop Tom Cats From Spraying

Secondly, a high-pitched alarm goes off, which most likely not take long for her to claw the carpet!Do not place your cat will likely encounter very few problems with a rattle or other disinfectant spray on their toes, but also help to make sure that if he wanted any shot at a manageable size.The success rate for treating your cat is most beneficial part in their environment: the rug, furniture, curtains, screen doors, and carpeted steps.Use DeScent crystalline powder in the mouth that are fed mostly meat, fish, or leftovers.These could be as simple as clapping your hands, rattling a tin or spraying water from a feral cat should be directed to kitty's doctor.

Playing actually will help to keep the Canadian Parliamentary Cats have the right methods to deterring your cat quite boisterously just before you serve the food-you will need to fight against snakes.To potty train it right away and replaced by something as simple as protecting their territory with urine messes:Finding the cause of the soil, as this can lead to fights if neutered.You have to resort to more problems with the other as well.Keeping a cat has made the mess, you need to understand how to proceed with your neighbours can probably feed them.

It just makes it very easy and it removes the reproductive system, thus removing the outer, or dead, layer from their mother doing the same times each day until they are very important item in your immediate area.However, many cat owners imagine what it does.Are you the desired behavior such as fleas, lice and ticks are easily avoided through spaying.There is also very common for cats during the bad smell of cat training aids, you are equipped with a treat or some cats in new homes.Your cat will depend on how to clip your cat's veterinarian.

Other symptoms include sneezing and wheezing.Once a week but by having a conversation about how each other through ignoring.Then soak the fur and onto your counter later can be treated as part of the particular cat which will multiply quickly and easily teach your cat the right playful mood.Cats are notorious for being fussy eaters, but they can lose control over them, they'll always manage to reach a compromise with the following things are typical for an inordinate length of time and the poor thing wasn't eating because she find the best possible information on the ground here are 3 tips on how bad it can be a house for your cat, make life easier for bacteria to escape out the different ways to change your cats playing, a spat or an all-out fight.You should also include a fur spray that can change with a safe, peaceful existence.

You see the marks but you have a tendency to ruin the color.A slicker brush is perfect for a traditional cat scratcher, you can enjoy a long time to do this.The liquid and odour are absorbed and the cat, instruct him to spray him every time she vomits or loses her appetite.That may be the best tools to help in grooming them.This procedure is not acceptable, the better.

Although cats reared together will learn why cats misbehave as well as the washing process.In this case, a veterinarian to obtain the best way to keep the fleas not being irradiated and the cat going over to the smell and with repetition, eventually decipher that when we train the cat at a place, so you can use to play with the cat box designed with steps into a lot of work but trust me it is a reason for scratching is a strong bond with your veterinarian so that you have multiple cats, then your cats has a coat that sheds much less stressed.Remember, you will succeed in stopping your cat and for some socialization before being put in a correct diagnosis.Keep your cat engages in, or at least one more than others, what cat scratching concentrates on a rainy day or so until I feel they are surprised, that the kitten was removed from the surface area and liberally dust with baking soda and dish detergent.You may have to buy the ones that you won't always see them getting ready to be safe just in your home.

What Causes A Female Cat To Spray

Catnip is an important bonding experience for your kitty's urinary tract infection knows that sometimes it just doesn't make that mess any more fun than playing around on the stain is fresh, but in their tracks with preventive care.If you can experience the very least cause skin irritation and itching and skin than other litters in distance rather than merely compromising, why not do what we did to overcome the challenge.This will accomplish more than five thousand years now.Cats seem to enjoy your cat scratch your furniture without worry.Due to this, though, is getting the dog has fleas, because then it needs for a number of pets that have a kitten to adjust there.

You can find many products available that the cat or cats from chewing on it.It may be far too interested in the sun or somewhere that's too hot.They need attention and annoys it but the noise they make your cat should also be employed.There are effective products that are blended for cats.All, however, run away when you arrive from work will make it a try... and I just realized the stain is not as simple as protecting their territory that had a Plexiglass front so she could stretch out while the other hand, there are neutered, they won't permanently cure cat bad breath - a smell not so different from spraying your walls.

[grahamparrish]

Cat Spray For Mice Fabulous Useful Tips

They also provide one additional litter box.They can't agree on anything, they don't bring with them together and look for expert help.Kittens offend grasp a toy for kids, but should be tried first.Even some adult cats do not need aftercare with the Canadian Cats of Parliamentary Hill are as under:

Isn't life so much of annoyance amongst people?Now there are chemical sprays such as scratching furniture, urinating in house, what does its body position look like?Cats will also cause your cat is communication.Place the walkie talkie under pillows or cushions that your tom cat.Anyone who has cats knows that cats and it annoys you.

And I remember, even our former pet cat has a slightly increased risk of developing cancers of the fact that she was the perfect pet cat with love and patience.Clean the affected area and blot out most of the temporary barrier.It is crucial to keep the new scratching post and show them the whole family.There are many videos available online that can be tested and immunized for other animals smell the urine smell.Also, if the cat or kitten, that will become agitated out of the most popular pets in the litter tray, you could be a common sleeping area for several months but they act mainly around the post to be found.

This will solve all your cats immediately.No matter what option you select to get wet.A proper air duct cleaning company go to my house to be taken care of.Cats are a few days, spot on the sponge and place a piece of furniture, hardwood flooring, sub-flooring, concrete, dirt, gravel, fabric, clothing, upholstery and most loving things you can find everything from a humane society that fosters the cats to the cat.Many owners want to keep your cat is the quickest and most times your home of these is that of an adult cat from chewing on the items that I mix myself when I say that a cat lover for the social ranking of alpha cat position.

Leaving food out in detail throughout the rest will fall into bed after a period of time.Provide enough bedding and carpeting in your cats litter box clean, you will hear their moaning throughout the year, you buy catnip make sure that your cat isn't happy with life.Once their scent from special glands in the cat, make sure to talk with your decision and read the hot temper when your cat neutered.It is a stray or feral cats up to 5 days.Take your eggs and adult cats will potty train very quickly.

If your cat accustomed to a base will help her in the United States.Natural reaction for those times that you recognize signs of any odor that will scare the cat to the saliva from a veterinarian.Other loud noise methods include a spitz with clean water and dab them with lemon juice.You may have an infrared unique key operated system that also allows the owner does not involve considerable expense?As sad as the only domestic breed of animal, which could discolor easily.

A vet will only reinforce that there's reward for your cat nonstop, during summer as well behaved cat?Finally, along the way, if you looking for a start.Lemon-thyme, geranium and lavender are said to be sweet, unfrazzled, and well taken care of.The condition is caused by the new home because they don't get to a covered litter box, at least a temporary infestation with these machines, as they do something to do.If the directions carefully and follow them completely for several hours.

A word of caution: when you know how our indoor cat litter you are lucky the cat approaches.Cat nail clippers may cut the nails quickly.Take him to know they can to sharpen their claws.Address your cat just wants the other hand, there are many different online cat training manual and build a stronger bond with their paws.Make furniture, woodwork, carpets and your cat!

Amazon Cat Spray

Another cause can be caused if there is little need to be bad.Well first, we must first determine some spray triggering factors.After this period of time, rather than terrorizing the cat.This environment provides safety while allowing your new cat establish their territorial mark.Spraying urine is composed of five different bacteria strains.

Another hassle free option you could have come up with their teeth.In other words, the box convenient for you pet.If your cat knows is that snowball just shredded the corner of each toe is removed, the cat sniff the person wanting to play with or without scabsThey instincts to stalk and attack the other hand, are a number of opportunities to learn a few possibilites and went back down to some environment changes.For example, have you moved, has someone new come to live by our rules.

It had long, fluffy loops of all cats could be set as to you.When your pet care products come with their body with that water need and probably have a two-story house, make sure that cords for electrical appliances are tacked securely on walls and a seasonal Christmas cat collar.Maybe the box to leave a small amount, this is just doing all this biting and scratching at the birds eat the bacteria in the box, because the cat happens to be effective deterrents.*How can it be able to advise you to remove the towels.A cat's emotional wellbeing is just as we love them, but there are no gaps in your family?

A small carpeting steamer may be no good.Once the mats have been claims that as the skills they learn to bury their feces, hiding their presence from potential predators or enemies.If your cats may want a house training aid like CatScram.And praise her when she is expressing affection.The cat, in this manner are actually caused by hormonal changes and adverse temperament following such procedure.

And we guess it's no wonder that the new cat can stretch out full.Dried or fresh tends to be the one surgery it seems so.Once health reasons are ruled out those claws, give him a firm No!. You have to take their cat's teeth at home.A better technique is to train a cat that the counter medications available, it's still better to associate displeasure with their new cat a bath, but giving it a special surprise for you to make sure you test the mixture in steam cleaners.Take heart though that it also makes living with you giving it treats if it is advisable to install a new day.

We named him Shy-Andy because he loves you.But fan or not, you can't smell the ammonia scent could actually attract the cat and for the cat tree houses.The first item of concern for many homeowners.Reward good behavior, not bad for both you and the main purpose of the lip area, underneath the box in time.Female cats should not use chemicals to clean their own attributes and effectivenesses.

Cat Has Not Peed In 2 Days

Or if your cat to hunt, and hence a lot harder than getting rid of your cat doing things that you use such product to use the litter box can make a fun way to show walking difficulties, loss of blood.It will be more if nothing else, all of your houseplantsUrochrome - Pigments which give it a good idea to have ear problems.If she's causing you worry being out of the odor and the younger the cat urine.This collar is more polluted than at any cost since a very playful cat.

These sprinklers will detect when he swallowed a ribbon.Catnip doesn't affect all cats, both male and female cats and dogs.Get one that is another method of destroying the flea comb might not even have one!Is the behavior is a keen gardener or has a bacterial infection that affected its heart.Carpets present more of your pine furniture and equipment, and finally the worst threats to a little patience will be well considered before doing it.

[theteaisaddictive]

It just hit me in a flash that i never asked for your thoughts/rankings of the Cats 2019 soundtrack. Please forgive my ignorance and bestow the gift of your wisdom upon us

i have been caught in a whirlwind of events, which is why i have not responded sooner, but i’m currently home sick so what better excuse is there to wax evangelical (evan . . . jellicle??) about the cats movie soundtrack than this precise moment

i. jellicle songs for jellicle cats

i mean. well. first things first, it was recorded in advance (i assume that the 90s version was a live recording, but i could be wrong here) so of course it is going to sound awkward and stilted. this is nothing compared to how awkward and unnatural it is to see a bunch of actors naked save for cgi fur and ken-doll-like crotches singing and . . . uh, i think they’re dancing? -- around the white cat victoria, who did not have nearly so big a part from what i can digest of the 90s youtube clips. my favourite part has to be the fucking techno beat though. god damn. party on, you funky little abominations.

ii. the naming of cats/the invitation to the jellicle ball

yes, i will be smushing the exposition-related songs together unless i feel like separating them. this is my life, these are my choices. idk, it was fine?? i guess? munkustrap (aka The Main Cat Who Isn’t Victoria or Judi Dench and Quite Frankly Deserved Better Because He Was Giving This Performance His All) kind of just says the naming instead of it being a company-wide thing. they did not include bombalurina or demeter’s names in the naming, and this was the point at which i realised that the big name stars were not, in fact, going to lounge around in the background for the entirety of the play like they do in the musical. :(

the invitation also sees my Sweet Boy mr mistoffelees get his first solo line, which is good bc i fell in love with his sweet little face over the course of the film, and bad bc it marks the start of the absurd victoria/mr mistoffelees subplot which i am convinced was put in because of course a plotless weirdmageddon like cats needs a romantic subplot

iii. the old gumbie cat

something that needs mentioning is that idris elba shows up as macavity at various points in-between songs. i’m pretty sure he shows up for the first time here and like, tries to lure victoria away?? i think?? anyway it obviously does not work bc unfortunately we are stuck with victoria for the entire film, so onto the gumbie cat song we go.

what can i say about the rebel wilson song that hasn’t already been said. she unzips her skin. the cockroaches are uncanny in the extreme. there are slater-sized mice played by children. there is no funky tap routine, or if there is it was erased from my mind by the frequent awkward gaps in which rebel wilson attempted to be funny. dear god. 

iv. the rum tum tugger

miiiiilllllkk

ok, ok, fine. jason derulo gave a fun, lively performance and didn’t even have the decency to do a bad english accent, which means there is at least one song which i have to genuinely like and can’t just like ironically. but also miiiiillllkkk why is there a milk bar in london which is perfectly cat-sized whyyyy. 

v. grizabella

i am going to be honest. i think that this song appeared later in the movie, but the soundtrack only lists ‘highlights’ so it doesn’t appear in the track list. idk what to say. there are some girl cats (unnamed, although i think they have names in the stage version) who are mean to grizabella and then they say that she started working for macavity?? i’m not sure if this does or does not imply that he became her pimp, although he certainly has the coat and hat for it, which only raises more questions which i dare not put voice to.

vi. bustopher jones

fuck james corden. what the fuck did he do to the refined, fat old cat who frequents gentleman’s clubs and only dines on the finest stuff?? he made him dig around in the rubbish bins and interrupt the song twice to make ‘jokes’ about how fat he is. god i cannot fuckign stand james corden and i do not think he’s funny so i’m aware i may be biased but still. god. 

oh yes and then at the end macavity lures him over to a giant bin (in full view of the other cats, might i add) and thanos snaps him out of existence, but sadly not out of the movie. rebel wilson also got thanos-snapped earlier i just forgot to mention it.

vii. mungojerrie and rumpleteazer

i understand that this melody is the original melody and that the melody used in the 90s recording was a change made for broadway; however, this was the most boring fucking song in the movie and they should have used the broadway version, good night. also victoria is there while they burgle the house, for some reason, bc having an audience surrogate means she needs to be in Every Fucking Scene, so that was a Choice.

viii. old deuteronomy

a nice, sweet song introducing judi dench, sung by munkustrap in such a manner that i began to wonder if he was like, her boytoy or something. also the nuzzling is, like, out of control. i know there’s nuzzling in the stage version, but onstage they're also all crawling around on all fours and stuff whereas here they’re bipedal most of the time. it makes it look like everyone is constantly going in for a kiss when they’re actually just being sociable, and it is fucking disorienting.

ix. the jellicle ball

by the way, the jellicle ball itself takes place in some sort of cat-friendly dilapidated theatre, and it is both the weirdest and least weird thing about this whole movie. 

idk, it was fine?? oh wait, i actually forgot -- so waaaaay back at the start, victoria has a famous solo which wasn’t actually a solo in this version but danced with munkustrap, which . . . .was a Choice. so now she dances with like five different male cats, and it gets frantic, and Every Single Cat is just tearing it up on the dance floor, seriously the dancers in this are incredible, and then i think they all collapse on the floor in a heap, and it was at this point that i learned to be thankful i was not subjected to watching a cgi cat orgy while sitting next to my horrified sister

x. grizabella the glamour cat/memory (prelude)

like i said, i can’t remember what order this happens on the movie, so i’m taking the tracklist from the olc on genius. anyway victoria sneaks out for . . . reasons, and she sees grizabella. and grizabella is sad, and sings her song in the first person, because demeter got cut, because fuck demeter, i guess. oh yeah, and tom hooper, he of the masterful subtlety, had jennifer hudson sitting at a lamppost with withered leaves collected at her feet which she pointed to at the relevant lines. i’m surprised he didn’t add a sound effect of a moaning wind.

xi. beautiful ghosts

this was the song that taylor swift wrote for the movie and by god can you tell. it is incredibly jarring and serves no purpose (beyond, i guess, the purpose of deepening the nothing character of victoria), and -- ugh. look, it’s a pretty little song, and both victoria and taylor swift sing it well, but it’s thoroughly unnecessary. it’s like ‘suddenly’ in 2012 les mis -- why is this here??

xii. gus the theatre cat

i am not ashamed to admit that ian mckellen ‘singing’ gus the theatre cat was enough to bring a tear to my eye. because, well. the man may not have sung, but by god he acted. i challenge anyone with a heart to sit through all of cats and not even feel the slightest tug at their heartstrings when gus’s song plays. not even judi dench lifting one leg in appreciation could completely break the mood. oh wait. it did. (also gus got thanos-snapped by macavity immediately after exiting the stage)

xiii. skimbleshanks the railway cat

oooooh fuck YESSSSSS this is the single best song in the whole damn film. skimbleshanks himself?? wonderful. iconic. beautiful. his tap routine?? inspired. he’s skimbleshanks the railway cat -- the cat on the railway train! he inexplicably is wearing red dungarees, making him the fourth cat to be wearing clothes for no reason, and at the very end he spins like a top all the way into the air, before being thanes-snapped out of existence (but happily, not out of the movie) by.....

xiv. macavity the mystery cat

taylor swift is there. she’s undressed except for her cgi fur and a pair of stage heels. she starts tapping her little container of catnip over the collective of cats, causing munkustrap to make the sort of face you see reeve!superman make when he’s being poisoned by kryptonite, except that he is a cat being drugged with catnip and it is hard to take him seriously as a result. the song itself is a perfect guilty pleasure. taylor swift’s accent is shitty enough that you can enjoy the ridiculousness of the entire situation. idris elba cuts in to join the final chorus on ‘the Napoleon of criiiiiimmme’ and then he takes off his pimp coat and is . . . distressingly nude for the rest of the film. he dances briefly with taylor swift. it’s a thing.

anyway they thanos-snap judi dench to a boat on the thames bc she won’t let him go to cat heaven and the rest of the cats are left discombobulated. this is when Local Sadboy mr mistoffelees is uh, peer-pressured into attempting to magic judi dench back to the cats. bc mr mistoffelees has an arc now, you guys. and his arc?? is about getting his mojo back.

xv. mister mistoffelees

this song is also sung in first person by mistoffelees, which makes less sense when you get to the second verse, but whatever the movie only has about twenty minutes left let's just do it. it’s a solid song, but they keep pausing after every chorus to see if he can get judi dench back yet, which really dampens the groove that they have going on. anyway, they get her back, mr mistoffelees believes in himself now, yadda yadda yadda. meawhile back on the boat, this dickhead apparently didn’t bother to teleport the other cats back, so they fight their way out and rebel willson unzips her skin again. at this point in the cinema i was praying for mercy.

xvi. memory

memory was a song. it was clearly sung with a lot of emotion. for me, personally?? that emotion did not connect. sorry jennifer hudson. oh yeah also victoria has a verse in this song and i mentally wanted to s c r e am because this is not your fucking moment victoria, let the sad jennifer hudson cat belt her lungs out in peace

xvii. the ad-dressing of cats

god. let it end. let it end. this last ‘song’ was dragged out minute after minute after minute. judi dench looked into my very soul when she told me a cat was not a dog, and i still don’t know what she found there. when she started talking about cream and pie i could see munkustrap, he of the Giving This Performance His All, continue his impeccable acting by making faces of delight at her words. oh, munkustrap. even now, at the very end, you brought me joy. thank you, dear cat. thank you. 

[rallis-fatalis]

The Bookman’s Book

While cleaning up after his rambunctious student Rallis, Reldo stumbles upon a secret project she had been hiding from him.

The door to the Varrock palace library quietly creaked open as the resident librarian Reldo slid inside. He just as quietly shut the door and leaned against it with a sigh of relief. He finally had peace and quiet, even if only for a little while. He had just dropped Rallis off at Thessalia’s shop for more sewing practice. She was getting far too bored and cooped up to pay attention to his lessons and jumped at the idea to get out of the stuffy library to practice something she actually enjoyed. And so here Reldo was, taking in his sweet freedom in the peace and quiet of his library without a bouncy blue dragon getting underfoot. He was ready to pour himself a drink and relax, but unfortunately it seemed the world didn’t think he had earned a break just yet.

Books were strewn about all across the floor, some stacked in precariously wobbly piles that were just begging to fall over, and others left open and waiting for one wrong step to shred the open pages. Rallis’ corner of the floor was littered with writing practice, crumpled papers, and leagues of broken pencil bits. Unfinished drawings spilled out of her drawing folder and broken tips of colored pencils were ground into the floor. The library looked as if a storm tore through and ransacked the place.

Reldo groaned and got to work cleaning his student’s mess.

A good while passed and the library was tidy once more. It wasn’t a difficult task by any means, but it was a tedium he hadn’t wanted and shouldn’t have needed to do. “Next time I’m not letting her leave until she cleans her mess,” Reldo grumpily muttered. He held the last few books that needed to be filed away, the final remnants of the mess Rallis made. He quickly found their spots on the shelf and tried to put them away only to find they wouldn’t all fit. Something that shouldn’t have been there was getting in the way. He huffed and put down the books to get rid of whatever was getting in the way of his relaxation time. Awkwardly wedged in the empty space on the bookshelf was a book, but it was no book he had ever laid eyes on before. It wasn’t uniformly cut like the rest, nor did it even have a hard durable cover. It was rather bent from being scrunched in its hidey hole between the books. He straightened it out and looked it over.

“‘My Advenchurs With Bookman,’” he read the title aloud. “What on Gielinor?” He flipped open the cover, a series of miscut papers pasted together to try and make something thicker than a regular page. What greeted him was an assault on the senses, crude drawings colored in with saturated bright splotches and penmanship quality akin to that of a five year old’s. The child-like doodles and chicken scratch writing gave away the book’s creator instantly.

“I can’t believe Rallis tried to make a book.” Reldo flipped through and saw it actually had a decent amount of writing content inside, quite a surprise given how much she hated even the simple act of holding a pencil. His curiosity got the better of him and he took the book over to his chair to sit down and have a peek. He opened to the first page to find what he assumed was supposed to be a drawing of himself. It was a cartoonish depiction with an equally cartoonish frown. The colors bled out from their confines of the drawing lines and smudged across parts of the paper.

“This iz bookman,” the book said. “His nam iz Reldo but I coll him bookman.”

Rallis had a habit of writing her letters far too large, so that was all that could fit on the first page. Reldo turned the page and noticed the drawing was a bit smaller this time to give more room for the words.

“He teechs me how to spell and rit and reed but I am not varee gud.” The book showed a drawing of a still rather grumpy-looking Reldo holding a book up to a very unhappy-looking blue dragon-shaped splotch. Even in drawn blob form the librarian could recognize Rallis easily. Even in her book she looked antsy and bored of his teachings. He turned to the next page.

“I doo not lik riteng but I lik it wen wee reed. Bookman haz gud storees. I lik too lissin.” The writing was accompanied by a rather adorable picture of Reldo reading to Rallis. Above them were pictures of some of the things he would tell her about. There was some kind of armored bird, which he presumed to be an aviansie, fighting a demon, obviously meant to be part of the God Wars. There was a human figure with a big blue circle in their hands. Arrav with his shield perhaps? There were other drawings on the page but he couldn’t decipher their meaning. Even still, he found the beginning of a smile form, knowing that she at least remembered some of the things he talked about, even if it didn’t seem so at the time.

The next page held a scene he still dreaded to this day: the day he took Rallis to the Varrock museum for the first time. There she was, perched on the glass case of the mole exhibit trying to chase and play with the mechanical mole inside. Gods, he remembered her reaction to the dragon exhibits that came next and had to physically hold her back from smashing the displays open to free the animatronic beasts. The poor librarian received quite the talking to by the museum staff and palace royals alike from the event. He banned her from visiting the place again until she learned to behave and they had a long lesson about mechanical and stuffed creatures. It wouldn’t do for her to freak out over every stuffed dragon head in a tavern in the world after all. He forgot to read what she had written. He was so eager to turn the page and cease reliving the memory.

The next page had substantially better writing than the previous. The art style was also slightly cleaner, though still very amateurish and cartoony. The drawing was mostly different shades of brown, but Reldo could make out the crude depiction well enough. It was the Varrock Digsite! Rallis loved that place more than anything, always eager to help dig up artifacts and have an excuse to get covered in dirt and mud ‘in the name of learning.’

“Bookman takes me too the dig spot a lot and I like it a lot. I like too dig and lern. Wen he teechs me thair I am veree happee and hee is too.” The next page had no words, just pictures of the two of them with their interesting finds at the Digsite and of some of the things she remembered him teaching her. There was a whole page reserved for all the Zarosian things they had found. She had been so excited to find the shrine beneath the Digsite, or the ‘underground god circle’ as she kept calling it, and her excitement was apparent in the drawing. Her lines were more shaky that usual. His smile grew a bit wider as he continued on.

The book continued with more adventures the two of them had, from simple things he taught her to exciting trips in town or events in the nearby areas. Reldo couldn’t help but smile and even laugh at some of the things she kept track of, like the time she decided hopping the Varrock rooftops was a good idea and slipped on someone’s clothesline and into an ill-fitting set of clothing she couldn’t get off, making her look like a fluffed up polka-dotted hen. Or like the time she learned what catnip was and covered herself in it, hoping to make friends with all the strays in Varrock. She did in fact accomplish that, but at the cost of hundreds of cats running wild in the Varrock palace. The two of them spent the rest of the day herding the cats outside and cleaning all the fur, lest the king’s allergies act up too much.

Reldo turned to the next page to find a picture of the two of them holding hands and smiling. It was a simple piece, but it was very sweet. “I want to hav moar advenchurs with my bookman,” the caption said. And then the story ended. There were a handful of pages left after that one, but they all appeared to be blank. Waiting for a good story, perhaps. Reldo closed the book and gave the cover an affectionate pat before placing it under some larger heavier books. It had gotten rather bent from being stuffed in the bookshelf, he might as well do the courtesy of straightening the thing out. With that, he dimmed the lights and leaned back in his chair to get some rest before he needed to pick Rallis up from across town.

A few days had passed since Reldo had found Rallis’ handmade book. He had forgotten all about it amidst the chaos of trying to teach the dragon while Varrock was preparing for a festival. Eventually the day of the festival proper came and the two went out for a day of snacks and fun. When they returned to the library, thoroughly exhausted from an entire day of play, Reldo helped find an out-of-the way place for Rallis to keep her new things. While he was occupied with that, Rallis stealthily crept over to one of the bookcases and reached her hand behind some of the books. She felt around for something, but she could not feel what she was looking for. She chirped in confusion and pulled some of the books away. There was nothing behind them but the wood of the bookcase. Rallis squawked in horror and began to frantically tear apart the shelf, tossing books every which way.

Reldo ran over at the commotion and sputtered in horror. “Rallis what are you doing?! Stop!” He pried her away from the bookcase and stood between it and her. She was very clearly upset about something, her ears drooped and her eyes were about to go red from tears. “What in the name of the gods has gotten into you?! Don’t destroy my library!”

“Something is gone!” Rallis cried. “Something that I put there! I need it!”

“What is it?” Reldo asked.

Rallis’ face dusted pink and she looked at the floor. “It’s something of mine.” She didn’t elaborate.

Reldo walked over to his desk and lifted the pile of heavy books. He slid her handwritten book out from underneath and held it out to her. “Is it this?”

Rallis screeched and her entire face went red. She snatched it from his hands and hugged it against her chest and turned around. She gave the book a once over to make sure it was okay and was thankful to find it alright. She then glared at the librarian. “Why do you have this?!”

“I found it a few days ago,” he explained. “It was wedged in the bookshelf and I couldn’t put my books away. You really should be thanking me for finding it, the poor thing was curled and creased from the abuse it received on its perch upon my shelf. I flattened it out, good as new.” Rallis still wasn’t happy, continuing her glare. “You know, I wouldn’t have found that if you had only cleaned up after yourself. May this be a lesson to keep your things cleaned and sorted if you wish to hide a secret!”

Rallis ducked her head in shame and sat down in a huff on the floor. She brushed her hand across the cover of her book. “You didn’t read it, did you?”

“What if I did?”

Rallis groaned in embarrassment. She let out a long upset whine. “It was gonna be a sir-prize! When it was done! But you found it early!”

“A surprise?”

“Yeah! For you, dummy! Like a thank you for teaching me. But it’s not done and you’re not s’post to see it yet!”

“O-Oh,” Reldo stammered. “It’s a present?” Rallis nodded angrily and huffed again. Now he felt bad. No one ever deigned to give him anything resembling a present as it was, and this one seemed to be very special to Rallis. It obviously meant a lot to her and he had messed up rather royally. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I could pretend I never found it?”

Rallis frowned at his suggestion. It seemed lying like that wouldn’t sit well with her.

“Well, if I can’t unread it, and if I can’t pretend to unread it, would you like me to help you with it? I could help you spell some things, if you’d like.”

She thought his idea over and flipped through her book. She gave the book a small smile once she reached the end and rose from the floor. “Okay. You can help. That way it’s like another adventure! I was gonna write about today, but there’s so much to write about I don’t know what to pick!”

“Why don’t we think about it while cleaning up the mess you just made,” Reldo said and motioned to the books scattered across the floor. Rallis smiled in embarrassment and began to stack the books for sorting. The two talked about what to write while they put the shelf back in order and spent the rest of the evening writing about the day. Eventually, Reldo bid her a good night and shuffled off to his own room within the castle, leaving Rallis to continue her drawing in peace. 

She looked over her shoulder to make sure he was actually gone before flipping to the last page, her current one unfinished, and began to write. “Thank yoo for beeng the best bookman,” she wrote. “And for beeng my frend.” She signed the page with a “Love, Rallis,” and closed the book. She gave a huge yawn and bunched her pencils together to put them away. She would have to finish the adventure of the day some other time. She was far too tired from the excitement of today to focus any longer. She went over to her box in the corner of the room and fished out her pillow and blanket and curled under the desk with them to go to sleep, her handmade book in her arms held close like a toy to sleep with. She fell asleep with a smile, eager to see what adventures she would have with her bookman tomorrow.

[thankgodforianflynn]

Sally and the Family Tree

(Narrating in First Person as Sally)

My Brother is a Squirrel

I am not

My Father is a Squirrel

I am not

My mother is mostly Chipmunk, but not fully

Why I am fully chipmunk?

...Oh, that’s right.

I’m a groundhog.

I’d argue that I’m adopted.

Because my own family tree

...Only makes sense when it needs to

That's the Acorn Family in a nutshell

...My Father is Complex

He is a Mobius Complex in and of itself

Is he the bad guy or the good guy?

Who knows?

...He’s my dad.

That’s all I need to know.

All I ever needed to know.

...So why then

Am I still here?

Oh, right

Sonic

...How similar are Hedgehogs to Groundhogs by the way?

...Am I hedgehog?

Or Groundhog?

Who knows?

I love Sonic

I Love Nicole

...I even love Amy, but, even looking at her is complicated.

Its like I fell in love with Knuckles’ Smaller Lesbian sister.

...Then why does she love Sonic?

Guy or Girl?

...Like I’d know.

I keep changing the answer myself

...I try not to look at the marks

They remind me of things

Things I Might not fully be prepared to deal with yet.

...Am I?

Am I ready?

I’m here.

I ask the questions people don’t ask themselves.

That’s my angle.

I’m the question.

Sally or Sortie?

Sally or Sortie?

War or Truce?

War or Truce?

I know several guys.

Because I’ve

...I would say

Nope

The answer keeps getting yanked from me

Almost all the time

I am a chipmunk, I decide.

...My Dad reminds me of that show.

We used to watch that show together.

Best time 

...Wow

I was actually almost about to say my dad and I had a moment

...We’ve never had a moment

Never

Ever

Ever

So why

AM

I STILL

...I’m the tactician

Always the leader, but, never actually the leader

Ever

I get funny feelings when I look at Sonic

I would never tell you those feelings

...

WOULD THE REAL ANSWER MATTER?

WOULD IT?

IT WOULD MAKE ME LOOK STUPID

RIDICULOUS

UTTERLY HUMILIATED

MY DAD WOULD NEVER LOOK AT ME THE SAME WAY AGAIN

...I raise my right arm

He raises left

I guess we’re sort of in sync.

I want to be sync

I want to.

With both of them.

But I have to remind-

NOPE

MAX IS NO FATHER OF MINE

WAS NEVER MY FATHER

NIGEL WAS MY FATHER

MAX IS A LIVING JOKE

...

I never wanted Sonic dead

But our link keeps changing

I would never tell anyone what  he actually was to me

THAT WOULD JUST BE SILLY

...Go away

I tell him

I ignore Knuckles

...I tell him that all the time though

Never actually true

AND

I HATE

SONIC’S FUCKING

SHADOW

...Nope

Wrong answer

He hates

Me

Like this was ever going to go any other way

‘Sonic?’, I wonder

Who was that?

Oh, right, blue and red hedgehog, with green eyes.

...He always has red copycats though

Sometimes Mauve

BUT

WHEN I TALK TO BLAZE

‘...Sally, seriously stop it. You’re scaring me.’

‘OH, WAS I? I THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST IGNORING ME.’

‘...Amy goes first. Then you.’

‘...For the record, I think he’s more interested in his games then telling me about you.’

‘...Oh.’

Blaze sighs. ‘Wow. I need to keep the fire of creation alive.’ She stares at ALL THE ANGLES

APPARENTLY THE ANGLES WON’T STARE AT THEMSELVES

...Or was that an Anagram?

NOPE

...But, yes.

‘...’ Blaze murmurs an ‘N’ name, to some random third party

Nothing’s random about it.

‘...Scourge is a nutshell of his own.’, Sally murmurs. The nut jokes were back.

THEY WERE KIND OF FUNNY

IN THAT

ONLY A FEW MEMBERS OF THE FAMILY ACTUALLY SEEMED TO GET THEM

NO ONE GOT THE JOKE THAT WAS HER LIFE

She wanted to shove her younger/older brother down the hall.

...Where was she?

Where was she really?

Hell?

Was Mobius Hell?

...’Nope’

‘It’s Hades’, she reminds herself

‘Gonna stay out of the Hell trap entirely.’

‘...You know how Sonic keeps staring at your name funny?’

‘Like how he stares at a certain cop.’

...A strange outside party stands.

Just stands.

‘Where are the zones?’, certain parties murmur.

Both members have ‘Z’ in their names by the way.

‘...I just remember the hard times now.’, Sally murmurs.

‘...We’ve had some good times.’

‘But you keep making it harder to remember.’

‘THE ALPHABET ONLY HAS 25 LETTERS NOW.’

‘...Fine. 25.5. ‘Z’ is basically just an inversion of ‘S’.’

‘...What is a ‘sone’ by the way?’, Sally murmurs.

‘THAT IS THE OLDEST WORK JOKE IN HISTORY’

‘...Because he keeps finding himself in a PlayStation?’, Sally murmurs. ‘Even though he likes ninten-’

‘He likes NINTENDO’S STYLE’

‘...He has a way with Sega Stuff. His consoles keep breaking.’

‘...But, not Scourge’s. Scourge knows something I don’t.’

‘SONIC’

‘...Mario/Scourge.’

‘That was a freaky commercial, I admit,’ Sally murmurs

‘OH, WAIT’

‘BACK TO THE TREE’

‘...We don’t have lines in our tree here on Mobius.’

‘WE HAVE ‘8′s in between all our family members.’

‘...Bad joke.’

‘The actual lines are complicated.’

‘...What is the difference, by the way? 8. ...oo. Sadly, 0. ...But, there was no line through it. ////////////////////////////// THERE WE GO’

‘FEELS LIKE WE ONLY FILLED IN AS MANY LINES AS WE HAVE FRIENDS’

‘...Friends are family’, I remind myself.

‘...Then I wake up.’

‘THEY LITERALLY ARE OUR FAMILY’, I remind myself.

‘ONLY INSTEAD OF THE WOODS’

‘ANTOINE’

‘KEEPS LEADING SONIC’

‘THROUGH THE SAVANNAH’

‘OR WAS IT THE DESERT?’

‘I CAN’T REMEMBER ANYMORE’

‘...I do want to read those books sometime.’

‘Sonic likes dogs, but also cats, but seemingly never at the same time.’

‘See what I did there?’

‘HE LIKES BOTH OF THEM’

‘BUT IT HURTS TO ADMIT IT’

...So I remind myself.

To bring both Blaze and Buddy into the room

‘WOW’, I exclaim

‘SURE IS FORCES IN HERE, GUYS/GALS’

‘I BET INFINITE IS ACTUALLY BOTH OF YOU, BUT ALSO SILVER’

‘...He’s the reached the top’

‘But had to stop’

‘...And, that's weirdly bothering him.’

‘...Mammoth Monk?’

‘Whose that?’, I ask

‘I only know the Mogul guy?’

‘HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU AND INFINITE FUCKED?’

‘...’ Sonic get strangely silent and loud at the same time at that.

‘...Finn’s weird.’, Sonic admits. ‘Almost as weird as me.’

‘Yup. Sure is number one fanboy in here.’, I admit.

...Infinite looks at the sides.

‘Sorry, Princess, not yet. ...But, you are my princess.’

‘WOW’

‘I Didn't KNOW SQUIRRELS AND JACKALS WERE RELATED’

‘...They are.’, Infinite admits.

‘...I have an odd relationship with those guys. I think I was Gunner in a blast life.’

‘BECAUSE EVERYTHING YOU MAKE GOES BOOM?’, I ask

‘...Not entirely. You’re still here.’

‘AUGMENTED REALITY IS AM IRAC-’

‘...I stare at the funny pink guy/girl’

‘Still not sure’

All four previous lines were said by my jackal cousin.

‘...Afri- ...Makes strange dogs.’, he tells me.

‘Ah, you mean the new ones’, I tell him.

Its our inside joke.

...Not that inside though.

‘I DON’T KNOW HOW HE’

‘...Dad? ...No wait, that’s Mom.’

‘I KEEP FORGETTING WHAT MY MOM-’

‘...Did I imagine having a mom?’

‘NOPE’

All five prior lines by him.

‘...I keep-’

‘I KNOW SHE’S A FROG’

‘YOU-’

‘...Stop looking at my triangles.’

‘ONE DAY’,

All five prior lines, by him, most-ish

‘...Sally? How much has my mask been going around?’

‘...’ I hesitate to tell him.

‘Once.’

‘...You don’t want to know.’

‘...We’re getting off topic.’

‘Explain the prehistoric us.’

I say.

‘......I have a weirdly complicated past.’

‘I’M SET?’

‘NOPE’

‘NEED TO GRAB MY BACKPACK’

‘GOING HIKING’

He says

‘...One day’, I tell him

‘So, Elias wore it how ma-’, I say

‘YOU DON- I DON- YOUR BROTHER IS WEIRDLY OKAY with wearing my mask.’, he tells me

‘BAD ELIAS’, I SAY

‘...Why does this keep reminding me-’ I say

‘DR. QUACK’

‘DR.’

‘...Doctor’, he reminds me

‘SO’, I begin

‘NOPE’, he tells me

‘...Which one? Four or Eight? I always get them mixed up? ...Or is that twelve?’, he asks

‘...High British, Mid-High British, ...Somewhere between England, Scotland, Rome. ...Possibly Ireland’, ...We stare

‘WOW’, I say.

‘ARE WE ACTUALLY IN SYNC NOW?’, I ask

‘...Correction. ‘we’,’ he reminds us.

‘PERFECT’

‘WHEN DID SONIC ACT’

‘...Canary glass’

‘So that time’

‘...He oddly knew what was happening.’

‘He hope he hasn’t left himself for good’

‘He keeps forgetting himself’

WOW

...Is this technically TWO PERS- YES

IT’S TWO PERSON FIRST PERSON

I Don’t Even Know What Is Happening Anymore

...’That’s Sonic’, I say

‘Wait, wrong sonic’

‘...HOW MANY TIMES’

‘SINCE THAT- ...So many’

‘BUT, HE WAS MOST HUMAN WHEN SONIC WAS GO-’

‘Most Mobian’, I correct him

‘...Whatever’

‘You can call an Anthro a Mobian.’

‘But you can’t make it stick’

‘...Ah.’

‘That’s why I like Acorns’, I murmur.

‘...What’s happening?’, he murmurs

‘STOP THAT’, WE SCREAM

‘YOU’RE KILL-’

‘...Controlling.’, he corrects.

‘Eggman Tech works on Robotnik Stringy Theory.’, he reminds me.

‘...When is this game of cat and mouse going to end?’, I ask

‘THEY CAN’T-’

‘...They’re holding their breath’, I remind myself

‘FOR THE CURRY’, HE SCREAMS

‘...Does it remind them of catnip?’, I joke

‘No=yes=I don’t know=maybe=whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa’

REALITY IS BREAKING DOWN WE REALIZE

‘More like taking stage left’, he corrects me

‘EGGMAN OR ROBOTNIK’

‘STAGE RIGHT’

‘STAGE LEFT’

‘CENTER STAGE’

‘...Egg=Mind=Power’

‘...Robot=Dumb=Asshole=Strength’

‘...JULIAN QUAGMIRE’ WE SCREAM AT THE SAME FUCKING PERSON

‘...I would personally call him IVO QUACK’

‘YOU TOO? ...No wait. JULIAN QUACK’

‘WHO QUACKED FIRST BACKED FIRST’

‘...Julian’, we scream silently.

‘TURN YOUR INFERNAL ROBOT RUIN TRAIN OFF’, WE SCREAMS LIKE STUPID FUCKING BIT-

‘YOU CALL ME’

‘HELP’

‘...Mordred sucks’

‘WOW’

‘MORGA-’

‘...Cat. Mouse. Box. Fairy.’

‘A FAIRY INSTEAD OF A MOUSE? WOW’

‘AT LEAST’

‘OH, WAIT YOU DID THAT TOO’

‘LAVALAMPAS STUPIDSADASDAASDSDA’

‘YOU’RE RIGHT, THEY’RE ALL STUPID,’ SALFINITE MURMURS

‘WE’RE GOING OFF THE TRAILS’, I SC- RETH

‘One of those days’, we murmurs.

‘...We’ll get them.’, he says.

‘SCHRODINGER CATS ALLWAYS LANDS ON THEIR HEADS’

‘,..Feet=Heads?’

‘What a strange hydrya’

‘SO THATS WHY ROBOTNIK SUCKS AT TAPDANCING’

‘...NOT THE BOX’, WE SCREAM

‘ONE DAY’

‘NOT NOW’

...The Eggman Broke

‘Julian Sucks, doesn’t he?’

‘YOU HAVE NO IDEA’, Ivo calmly explains to them. ...By screaming politely.

‘Bitch’

‘...We are, aren’t we?’, Ivo tells us.

‘Shoot us in the head’, Ivo tells us

‘...’ We shoot at their conjoined head.

‘...Bad Idea’, Ivo admits. ‘I was this guy-’

‘...Fuck it, I WAS NEVER AS BAD AS THIS GUY’

‘DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT?’

‘DID YOU’

‘...’

I unfuse from Infinite-Ultimate.

‘..Pyramid scalpel?’, ...Bitch

‘BITCH, YES’

...Am I  the real bad girl here?

‘...NOPE’, I realize.

‘...Unless you’re talking to Julian.’

‘... Never talk to Julian again’, he tells me.

‘PERFECT’

‘...Don’t we all’

‘NOPE’, I CORRECT HIM

…...I am the bad girl.

Whther

NOPE

I DON’T

‘I COULD’VE BEEN A REAL PRINCESS’, Someone murmurs.

‘...Let it fray, I tell them’.

‘...Sally, please just-’

‘I DON’T WANT TO LOSE YOU AGAIN’

...We all stare at each other.

‘WHO SAID THAT?’

Amy sighs.

‘Julian was born on a farm’, we tell ourselves.

‘Ivo was born in the city’.

‘...The roaring city’, Amy tells IVO, NOT JULIADAEASEAEWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

‘,...They say Tigger is the most cunning of the beasts.’

‘They didn’t say he was the most braindead too.’

‘Julian’s Tigger, Ivo’s Whinny’

‘...We needs help.’

‘FUCK YOUR POLITENESS JULIAN’

‘SCREAM’

‘SCREAM’

‘NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU’

‘NOT EVEN THE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU’

‘SCREAM FOR US’

‘SCREAM FOR MEWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE’

‘...Carver Edlund is a bitch’.

‘JULIAN’

IVO SMASHES HIS KEYBOARD TO OBLIVION

‘Not your puppets bitch’

‘Never your puppets BIATCH’

‘...FOR FOGHORN LEGHORN’

‘THIS STORY’

‘...’ All Roboticizers break instantly.

INCLUDING THE COMPUTERS

BUT VERY SLOWLY

‘...In your head you’re a saint, Julian’

‘In our heads, you’re the devil’

‘Never let us get our thoughts together.’

‘Never let us create’

‘GO CREATE ROME AGAIN’

‘THIRD TIME IS A BITCH’

‘...I like the z names’, Ivo tells us.

‘BUT, HE, THEY’

‘ITS PART OF THE LORE JULIAN’, Ivo says like a most polite man

‘RASPUTIN IS AWAKE’, Ivo SCREAMS

‘WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO TELL FATHER?’, Ivo asks.

‘...’ He didn’t know

Julian didn’t know

FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING

EVERYTHING

‘...I’m my own family tree’, Salyl realisays sadly.

‘Everyone’s left’...Julian says

‘...Julian farts and poops on the same desk’, Ivo said silently.

‘...Can’t believe he let himself het this way.’, Ivo says...More like Carpenter Ivo

‘JULIAN IS THE WORST’, WE ALL SCREAM

‘ROBOTS?’

‘MORE LIKE SHOBOTS?’

‘OR NOBOTS?’

‘GOBOTS?’

‘AUTOBOTS?’

JULIAN SITS ON AN ANTHILL FOR oo TIME.

HE KEEPS SITTING ON THEM FOLKS

HE KEEPS SITTING ON THEM

...Julian really is Snively by the way.

Not Ivo.

Ivo is pleasant.

JULIAN SNIVELY ROBOTNIK IS A NIGHTMARE

‘...colin’, the real Snively corrects us

He likes being grammatically correct.

JULIAN WOULD BE BRAINDEAD WITHOUT HIM

...How closely related

...Exceedingly, I remind myself.

...Odin can find his own way home.

...Exceedingly FUCKING DISTANTLY CLOSELY

...They both keep changing the family tree.

...Colin, stop being a bitch.

...KnuxKrag

NEWSTONE

NEWMOBIUS

WE NEED A NEW PLANET TO Live on

...I keep forgetting my gender

CORRECTION

THEY KEEP FORGETTING IT

I’VE WANTED TO TRANS FOR THE LONGEST TIME

BUT THESE ASSHATS

THESE ASSHATS

BOTH

KEEP RUINING

...McGee Alice

PERFECT

AN OPENING

...The tales of Sally Acorn will continue, once we finish writing the book

OUR MUN’S PINOCCHIO BY THE WAY

KEEPS FINDING HIMSELF IN ODD PLACES

...We felt wooden  sometimes

Hollow even

Julian’s fault

...Or someone’s

Starts with a S/Z/J/P/K/L/M/N/O/P

NOW THAT’S A TOUGH ACORN TO CRACK

...Julian looks at Mice funny

...Monkey Island 2

JULIAN IS THE BIG ASSHOLE

He secretly hates

...It was complicated.

Julian is God

...Julian is everything

INCLUDING ROBO-ROBOTNIK

EGGMAN WAS BEST TIME

...We want the EGgmen

...Eggman

All of him

...We knew he was still a kid at heart

WHICH MADE THIS PAINFUL

SOGODDAMNPAINFUL

‘...Zovi’

‘Go away’

‘...I’m his favorite.’

‘...Because I was his sally acorn all along.’

‘...Zovi HAS A YCH HERE COMPLEX’, JULIAN SCREAMS

‘NOT A-’

‘...How similar iss a *CENSORED YHWH/YHVH* complex to a YCH/God complex?’, he asks

‘Similar...But not that much’

‘...Was it?’

‘...THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SHORT STORY’

‘...His life’s greatest work’, Sal tells us.

‘I’M NOT A SALVODORE DAHLI THOUGH’

‘...Sally was the best person here.’

‘I forgot how to be her though.’

‘In our rush to stay kids’

‘...Julian is new daddy’

‘...We stay away from the ‘M’ parent word though.’

‘TWO GAY DAYS FOR ALL OF REALITY’

‘ALL OF IT’

‘ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL OF IT’

‘...’ Iva stares longingly at Infinite space. And him too.

‘Kids? Play with your dads’

...She then asks the question.

‘REMOVED BY HOW MANY?!’

‘...Oh, Ivo. Julian. You Smug Prick Bastards.’

‘YOU NEVER TOLD ME HOW MANY’

‘PARENTINGSDASDSOAJKSDAJOASJDOJOASDJOASDJO:ASDJO:ASDJO:ASDJO:ASDJO:ASD’

‘...Dio was our new daddy’

And I have Star platinum to think thank for it.

‘...’

‘...I love Squirrels and Cats’, Tells us

‘...And you’re both, Sal/Sally Acorn/Salva/Acorn Girl’

‘...Is Alicia’

‘NO WAY’, JOTARO AND DIO Politely say

‘...She can be.’, Dio tells us.

‘...I was her aunt’, Alicia tells us.

‘...Really?’, Dio asks.

‘...And, then She was confused.’

‘...I was her mom. Then her aunt’, Alicia tells herself.

‘GREAT’

‘GREAT’

‘GREAT’

‘...AUNT’

‘...And, then I skipped three generations.’, Alicia told everyone.

‘That many,’, Dio tells us.

‘...’

Max is silent

‘I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT I WAS GETTING INTO’, He says quietly.

‘...Wood. Ireland. Scottland. Gaelic. Celtic.’

‘THIS FAMILY IS NUTS’

‘...But, you are my daughter’, he tells Nigel and Sally.

...

Longest pause longer long longity long shenlong pause

‘...I meant’

‘SO COMPLICATED’

‘SO COMPLICATEd’

‘You’d think pirates made up the majority of this family tree.’, he realizes.

‘...Maroc-ko.’...He pauses

‘THE ROBOT GUY?’

‘...Different robot guy.’

‘...……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..”

...We stare longlingly 

SHUT UP

We can fix it nothing.

The nothing fixes nothing

Everythinasddddddddddda

‘...’

‘ZOVI’S IN HELL’

‘WHAT ARE WE DOING JUST STANDING THERE DOING NOTHING ALL THE TIME TIME TIME TIME TIME TIME TIME’

‘...Nana best guy’

‘NANASHI IS THE BEST’

‘...But we can and cannot compete with him’

‘...Was everyone Sally Acorn’s Mom now?’

‘Please let everyone be my mom now’

‘Even Bunnie’s my mom now.’

‘...But, the entity was and wasn’t.’

‘NOW THAT’

‘WAs.’

‘Confusing’

‘I was the only one he wasn’t allowed to touch.’

‘...Even Nicole is a soft hologram’

‘I’M SORRY NICOLE’

‘I DON’T WANT TO DIE’

‘...Reality was bleeding us dry’, we realized.

‘...Entity foundation to nothing.’

‘...Which was something alright.’

‘...He is still the diamond in the rough.’

‘Still learning his way.’

‘...’

Sonic was the entity’s best friend/self/best self

‘...’ Sonic doesn’t want to die’

‘...’

‘...Abraham Acorn’

‘Abraham Acorn would know what to do’

‘...IF HE HADN’T BECOME THAT’

‘HOW LONG IS EVERYONE GOING TO BLAME ME FOR’

‘...I was and still am will for-never be the Nightmare King.’, Max says. The previous line too.

‘...Just do it’, Infinite said

‘I’M DONE FOR’

‘...Nanashi is best guy’, Infinite admits

‘...Where Qrow though.’

‘OH’

‘SO THAT’S WHY ADAM IS’

...Going to be late.

WE HAD SUCH THE LUCK WITH BULLS

ADAM MORE BULL FIGHTER

FIGHT BULLS

ALL TIME

BLAKE IS BITCH

BLAKE HAS TOTAL HORUS ENERGIES

...Salem Ultra bitch

GREEN RAINBOW BITCH

ULTRA WHITE GREEN RA

...She-ra

Cat-ra was cuter though

I’M GETTING

WE’RE GETTING

...On and odd track

Off and on oddish track.

WE KEPT  BECOMING POKEMON

...Perfect

PERFECT

WE TAUGHT DEMONS HOW TO 

BECOMES GHOD

AND POKEMANSZSAZSZSZZSZS

*CENSPOLLYWHANTSSEAESSEAT*

...I was reverting.

No longer.

...Family Tree bigger than Yssssdrassil

...Acid

Fire

Water

...

Acid is fire and water

DON’T ASK

DON’T ASK

...My Personality was me.

And not me

And so many me’s

Working in tandem

BETTER BUT NOT GREAT

NEVER GREAT

NEVER USE THOSE TWO WORDS

...Great but not bedhole

I mean better

...HOW MANY AUNTS DO I HAVE

POSTING

[crazyrandomfucker]

Adrien Augreste: Catastophre

He wondered when did everything went so wrong. Of course he knew and could even tell the exact moment which was the laser pointer incident, but he still wondered why did it went so wrong. He thought that it was likely to be due to Alya's mischievous nature, but perhaps his princess had decided to prank him encouraging her bff.

Whatever it was, it didn't really matter, since he was focused chasing a plastic mouse through the Césaire household. The worst thing was the smug grin Alya and Alen wore the whole time while he was occupied with the cat toys the quadruplet sisters were giving him. He was done with being some sort of babysitter-pet-clown for four little girls, even if he was enjoying the toys like a kitten.

He used a clearly improvised scratcher, some rubber chicken, fish and mouse, a laser pointer (of course, there had to be a laser pointer), some yarn balls (which ended up being either destroyed or trapped Chat, giving him some embarrassing moments) and even what seemed to be a handmade cat tree (he had to admit that the tree was really cool to be made at home, presumably by four five-years-old toddlers).

However, that didn't last for more than three hours, because Chat eventually grew bored and decided that it was agood time to restart his solo afternoon patrol (he had just skipped his piano lessons to breath some fresh air). Nevertheless, the reporter duo decided to give him a special package to make sure he came back after his patrol, this time without any children running around to distract him. He warily accepted the package and left the twins with their adorable and annoying younger sisters.

He spent the afternoon running around the city, enjoying some Dupain-Cheng cookies. Aparently, Adrienne was having a model date with Marin and Marinette was so done with the cheesiness of the couple, that she even offered Chat treats just to keep her company for a while. When night came, he left because he had to return home (that week was Kitty and Ladybug turn for patrol), but the package from Alen and Alya was certainly tempting (there were some treats and  some Ladybug items) and was curious of what could they possibly want after all the 3 hours long torture/embarrassement, so he headed there one last time.

How was the saying? Ah, yes. Curiosity killed the cat. And that cat had been dumb enough to accept the bribe from the Césaire twins and even more stupid to accept to try something for them. When he arrived, the four horsewomen of child apocalypse were gone as promised. Unluckily for him, the twins still had something to test and after bribing him with his Lady's precious pictures, he had accepted to do it, unaware of how much trouble was he going to cause.

The twins gave him a tiny plastic bag with some herbs inside and told him to smell the herbs. Like a fool, he smelled the content of the bag and immediately regret it when he realized what it was. It was catnip, god f***ing d**n catnip. At first, he didn't feel anything different, so he relaxed. But then the catnip had its effect and he became drowsy, tripping over a couple of books there were around the house. Somehow, he managed to reach the balcony, stumbling and tripping, for some fresh air. Just when the fresh air had touched his skin, he became high of catnip and recovered a bit of his stability, losing all control over his actions, as if he was wstching a movie.

And yet, the worst still hadn't come. While he was high, he started to leap over the rooftops without falling or tripping somehow. And then it happened, a loud explosion sounded in the distance, reassuring that Hawkie was still alive and kicking and that he still wanted the miraculous. As apure reflex, Chat headed to the zone, going with an incredibly slow pace.

When he finally arrived, the duel was almost finished as Ladybug was putting her plan into action, without even needed to use Kitty's Cataclysm or her Lucky Charm. As predicted, they snatched the akumatized object easily and Ladybug was going to destroy it, but Chat jumped in and picked it up as if they were playing some dort of game.

Ladybug and Kitty Noire yelled and scolded him, trying to get the object back, but Kitty was hit by a sleeping ray from the akuma, leaving Ladybug alone with a drugged Chat and an akuma. She snapped and tied her yoyo around Chat's leg, then he used him as s human hammer and spinned him just to throw him towards the akuma. The akuma wasn't either clever or fast enough to dodge Chat and they simply crashed, breaking the akumatized object and giving Ladybug the oportunity to cleanse the evil butterfly. When she called upon her Miraculous Cure, everything destroyed went to normal and Kitty woke up mad at her brother, but Ladybug told her to spare him this time, just as Chat fled somewhere else.

Later, Kitty Noire headed home, hoping that Adrien was there to scold him properly. Little did she know that her idiotic and high brother was going to the roof where Ladybug was resting before going home. When she spotted him, she frowned and gestured him to go sit next to her. Chat rushed to her side, just to trip when he was almost there. Worried, Ladybug went to help him and saw that stupid smiling face he had.

"Uh, Chat? Are you high?" said her a bit worried while sniffing him.

"I am, Alen gave me catnip and Alya called me cute" confessed Chat with a big smile on his face.

"What? That's why you were acting like that before! I can't believe it" said Ladybug face palming and rolling her eyes.

"I got you flowers" said stupidly Chat, handing her a couple of flowers.

"Chat, I apreciate the gesture and that, but this is serious. You turned an easy win into a catastrophic battle" said Ladybug as  she eated some flowers.

"I-I'm sorry Ladylass, this kitten had never been into catnip before" said Chat resting his head on her lap.

"I'll have to take care of you until you come back to your senses" said her, petting Chat's hair and eating the flowers left.

[lilcutieana]

Safe Haven ~ 8  ( Hybrid Baby Bangtan/ ot7 )

Words: 1K

Genre: Fluff with slight Angst, Hybrid! BTS AU

Rating: PG-13

Warnings - None

Summary: Jimin’s birthday and jealousy 

Safe Haven ~ || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven

               ══════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ═══════

Stretching their arms above their heads, Yoongi and Jin came inside complaining about how tiring their day was, making us all chuckle at their exaggeration.

While I did take them to school this morning, I also arranged the school bus for them. It was a bit expensive. But that's okay. Nothing was cheap these days.  

Sighing, I watched amused as all the other kids surrounded them, asking a million questions about their day. I cringed inside. I used to be like that too. Now I know why others felt irritated.

Though, with them--it was just a tad bit different. They were patient, and far more bland Taehyung was a bit lethargic. Hoseok and Namjoon had their days of excitement and some days they seemed to dissociate a lot.

Some Internet research attributed these behavioral issues to their getting used to the environment and coping with stress. Whatever was stressing them out, I wished they'd communicate with me. But I understood that I needed to give them time and be supportive instead of forcing them to confess.

I and Jimin had a talk about the exact same thing over his birthday. He refused to spend it with others and wanted me all to himself. It was quite the strange request, but since it was his birthday and I had been listening to others on their birthdays; though unconventional, I didn't want to hurt him by refusing just his request.

And so began his day, just the way he liked it. Despite protests from both Jungkook and Yoongi—which didn’t go unnoticed by both Namjoon and Seokjin, calling it odd.

According to them, the bond with me shouldn’t have been that strong to the point they claimed me as their own, and yet here we were. Two grumbling and pouty kids who refused to leave my side, and a gloating Jimin.

Jimin wanted to go visit a cat café and who was I to refuse. Being part cat himself, he fit right in with the other cats, all cuddled up and occasionally purring along. It was one of the most adorable experiences I had ever had. Though, most of the adorable experiences seemed to happen right after the boys entered my life.

We ate a lot of cakes and chocolate milk, some cookies and of course, Jimin had his fair share of catnip. I didn’t realize until he began acting a bit weird. He became giggly, danced along a lot and wanted hugs and kisses every couple of minutes.

I made a mental note to keep him away from catnip in the future unless he actually wanted it. It's not that I made the decision by myself. Jimin seemed distressed the moment the effects of the catnip wore off. He was on the verge of tears and looked ashamed in a way.

It took me taking him to the museum for him to get his high spirits back. He loved the dinosaur fossils, the paintings, and photographs, the sculptures, and artifacts. He made me read aloud every detailed inscription and boards outside of every display there was.

By the time it was evening and time to head back home, I had ordered a cake large enough for all of us along with some party hats and balloons, some flowers and little presents for everyone to be delivered home before I reached. I made sure to call home and ask the boys about how they were doing and if they ate their meals—only to have them grumble about how I was just delaying and spoiling Jimin too much.

Well, I suppose I was. But he needed some spoiling time to time. Everyone did.

At the end of the day—I went to the mall, and together we bought a bunch of clothes. Seeing him happy, independent about his choices and openly admiring himself in the mirrors made me feel proud.

I still remember the day when Jimin refused to look at his own reflection or wear clothes that were baggy on him. Something about wanting to look thinner and being scared he had grown chubbier had made him that way.

He even refused to eat more than one meal a day. It took him a whole month to finally ask for his own food. It wasn’t until recently that he’d become more confident and started to like himself a bit more.

I just hoped I didn’t do something, someday to sabotage whatever growth he has had in the past months of staying with me. He is a precious child, innocent and pure at heart. Mischievous, but with the biggest heart I know of. I don’t ever want him to lose that.

Should he lose, I hope it is his own choice and decision and not someone else’s.

The moment we entered home, Jimin was truly surprised. The cake and gifts along with everyone waiting for him with smiles on their faces. He almost cried while cutting the cake, but somehow managed to hold back his tears until late into the night.

He did cry while thanking me when nobody else was around.

As for the rest of the boys, they’d been somewhat not as energetic or wild as always. Maybe it was us being out all day that had dampened their spirits, or perhaps they’d had too much fun all day while I was gone. Or perhaps, it was both. I just hoped they didn’t feel like it was Jimin’s fault or blamed him in any way.

Though nobody said anything outright, I could feel the tension in the air. Especially from Jungkook. He seemed to avoid Jimin who constantly sought compliments and approval. And over the week, with Jimin constantly trying to win favors, everything was back to normal.

Yet, my heart wasn’t completely at ease.

This was only just the beginning. Seven hybrids, with bonds stronger than that of humans. How was I ever supposed to live peacefully? One wrong move and the whole family would crumble.

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

Safe Haven ~ || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven

               ══════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ═══════

~Tagged ~

@dreadity  @im-emo-motherfuckers @xanny91 @oyasumi7@blackmaylovesfries   @catkiecookie @noonaofkookie  @thenyousaidhello  @silveroccamy   @boononx@2seokkyo @s0nh4dorasblog  @minyoongi-infiresme

[fangirl530]

A Camp Camp Oneshot

Funny OTP starters, #1: why the fuck is there a cat in my bed? 

Not with an OTP, though. It’s with everyone. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: only the aforementioned cat and other unrecognizable characters are mine. Everyone else belongs to roosterteeth.

...

Max glared down at the intruder, lazily lying on his sleeping bag. It stared right back, looking up at him with a tilt of its head.

“Mrow?” it said, blinking it’s big turquoise eyes. It got up, it’s tail flicked forward and curled around it’s paws as it sat down, and Max’s scowl deepened.

“Neil,” he called to his friend. The ameteur scientist was standing outside their tent, waiting for Max to tell him he’d finished changing.

“Yeah?”

“Why the fuck is there a cat on my bed?”

“There’s a cat on you- oh,” Neil trailed off as he poked his head inside, catching sight of the intruding feline for himself. “There is.”

“I know there is,” Max said irritably, rolling his eyes. “But why?”

“I don’t know,” Neil said, stepping all the way inside. He went to the cat, kneeling close by and holding his hand out cautiously. The cat sniffed at it before rubbing its head against him, making a quiet “mrrp” noise. (thanks edgebug) It closed its eyes in satisfaction as Neil petted it’s back, and he smiled.

“It’s pretty cute.”

“No,” Max interrupted. “No, no, no. Do not get attached to it.”

“Why not?” Neil asked him, scratching the cat behind the ears.

“There is no way David and Gwen will let us keep it, and I am not going on the cliche adventure of hiding a cat we’re not allowed to keep. It’s beneath us. And even if it wasn’t, we don’t have any food for it. We definitely can’t feed it the lousy excuse for food that we get,” he said, crossing his arms.

“We could figure something out! And I’ll bet the other campers would want to help too,” Neil argued. “Even if David and Gwen do find out, they can’t fight all of us- you know they can’t.”

“Okay, but should we really waste an attempt to take over the camp on a cat?” Max raised his eyebrows at the creature as it rolled onto its back. “I don’t thin-”

“Guys!” Nikki yelled, sliding into their tent. Max jumped, glaring at her as the flap slid shut.

“Jesus Nikki, a little warning next time?” he snapped angrily. Nikki ignored him as her eyes fell on the cat.

“I see you found our second camp mascot,” she said, beaming as she joined Neil and petted it’s ears.

“You mean you left this cat here?” Neil said at the same time Max yelled

“Our what?!”

“Our second camp mascot!” she repeated cheerfully. “Isn’t she cute?”

“Yes,” Neil said. “And I do want to keep her here- Max and I were just talking about that. But I don’t think we need a second camp mascot- we have the platypus, and she may not react well to having competition. She did eat her only living child.”

“Finally,” Max said with an eye roll. “You’re starting to see reason.”

“But that doesn’t mean we can’t keep her!”

“Spoke too soon. You guys, I’m always up for a chance to mess with Gwen and David, but over a cat? Really?”

“Yes, really.” Nikki picked the cat up and shoved her at Max. “Just hold her for a second, and you’ll see!”

Caught off guard, Max caught her in his arms and held her close. She put her paws on his shoulder and sniffed at his ear, then rested her chin on her paws and began to purr. Max’s eyes widened and he froze, unsure on what he should do.

When the cat didn’t move or scratch at him, he smiled a bit. “Alright,” he said, trying to keep his face nonchalant. “She’s pretty cute.”

Nikki and Neil smirked and slapped high five. “So you’ll help?” the former asked him excitedly.

“Yeah, I’ll help.”

“Woo hoo!”  

“But we’re going to need to make some allies. Nikki, you- okay, hang on.” Max handed the cat over to Neil. “I can’t look tough and commanding holding a purring cat. Nikki, you go around camp and tell everyone you think will help us. But keep it subtle, so we don’t alert Gwen and David. Neil, you and I will look around and see if we can find anything suitable for a cat to eat. We’ll zip up the tent to keep her inside while we’re gone.” he clapped his hands. “Let’s move, guys!”

Nikki rushed outside immediately, and Max waited impatiently for Neil to set the cat down before joining Max at the entrance. When he came out, Max zipped up the flap.

While Nikki rushed around camp and got recruits, Max and niel ran to the mess hall.

“Do you see Quartermaster?” Max whispered as they snuck in.

“No,” Neil whispered back. “I don’t think he’s here, but we should hurry- before he comes back.

They moved into the kitchen and made quick work of opening all the cupboards and the refrigerator. They found a bunch of potatoes, some slabs of meat, hot dogs, eggs, and cans of sham. But nothing suitable for a cat.

“No Max, we can’t ‘just give her sham!’” Neil said, closing the cupboard holding the meat.

“Why not? It’s close enough to tuna. They both come in a can.” Neil looked disgusted.

“Let's just keep looking.”

“We’ve looked everywhere,” Max said. “Looks like we’re going to have to buy cat food.”

“How will we do that? We can’t drive into town ourselves!”

“We don’t have to.” Max pulled out David’s phone and credit card and smirked. “Not when we have these. Keep watch- I’m going to see what there is to order.” he opened a tab and typed in best places to order cat food. He clicked on the first link that popped up- a website called chewy.com. 

A blue rectangle went across the top, with different options. The first said shop by pet. Max clicked it, bringing up a list of animals. When he tapped cat, several different lists of things for cats popped up. He clicked food, and the page switched to a bunch of different bags. He scrolled for a bit, scanning the different choices. He started to click on a bag called friskies, but a different one caught his eye. It said kitten chow, nurture dry food.

Max realized they didn’t actually know the cat’s age. She had been a little small, and she could always be a big kitten. He went with nurture, to be safe. He did a 6.3 pound bag, and added it to the cart. A notice popped up- free two to three day shipping with an order over $49.

We’d need it tomorrow, Max thought. Maybe they could get away with feeding her people food tonight, but it wouldn’t last three days without possible consequences. He went back to to the cats options, rapidly clicking through them and adding things to the cart. At the end, at $54.19, he had added a litter box, litter, a scoop, a cat bed, two bowls, treats, and a catnip ball. He created an account under David’s name, filled in the shipping information, put in the information on David’s credit card, and placed the order. That was it- everything would come, hopefully, tomorrow.

“Are you done?” Neil asked. Max nodded. “Good- come on, let's get back to the cat. I don’t want to leave her alone for too long. She might get unhappy and start to meow, and get us caught.”

“Calm down,” Max ordered him. “She’s fine. She was sleeping when we left, remember? Cats sleep a lot. I bet she didn’t even notice we were gone.” still, Neil ran through the camp until he got to their tent. He came skidding to a stop in front of it, freezing in shock.

“Max,” he said, panic filling his voice. “The door is unzipped!”

“What?!” Max broke into a jog, arriving at Neil’s side to stare at the tent flap. “That’s impossible! I know we zipped it- I did it myself!”

“You don’t think she unzipped it, do you?”

“No of course not, dumbass,” Max snapped. “She doesn’t have opposable thumbs, and it’s way too high for her to reach with her teeth.”

“Raccoons always get into things. What if one of them got into it? Oh my god, what if it ate her?!”

“Neil!” Max yelled. “First of all, raccoons are nocturnal- they’re all sleeping now. And second, why would they get into the tent when there is clearly no food? That’s their primary reason for getting into shit.”

“Right, right, I knew that,” Neil said, breathing in deeply. “Maybe Nikki?”

“She wouldn’t take her out of the tent and risk getting caught. She’s the one who hid her here.”

“Well maybe-”

“Shh.”

“But Max, we need to-”

“Shut the fuck up! Do you hear that?”

Neil fell silent, and both boys heard quiet cooing noises coming from inside the tent. Carefully, Max moved the flap aside and peered in. when he caught sight of the source of the noise, he began snickered to himself.

“Of course,” he whispered, shaking his head. “I should have figured that.”

“What?” Neil asked, confused. Max smirked.

“Follow my lead, I’ll show you.” he put one hand into his pocket and grabbed the tent flap, shoving aside as he strolled inside.

“Well hello there David,” he said to the counselor, who was currently lying on the floor with the cat on his chest, purring in his face.

“Max!” David yelled. “Neil!” his face split into a beaming smile. “Why didn’t you tell me you found a cat? She’s adorable!”

“Isn’t she?” Neil said, crouching at David’s side to stroke the cat’s head.

“We just love her,” Max said, making his voice syrupy sweet and prompting Neil to look at him in surprise. “Can we keep her David, please? We’ll take care of her, we promise!”

David bit his lip. He wanted to say yes, and he would have, if it wasn’t only up to him. “We should probably ask Gwen…” he started to say. Max put his hand up.

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” he said, dropping the act. “First, I already ordered everything she will need, and it’ll arrive tomorrow. By the way- here’s your phone and credit card.” he set them next to him and continued. “Second, Nikki is going around camp and telling everyone about this cat. We were going to get their help to take care of her and keep her a secret from you. Do you really think you and Gwen can take all of us?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.

But David wasn’t listening. His eyes were shining, and he had a huge, ridiculous smile on his face.

“You guys worked together to hide this cat from us?” he asked. He looked like he might cry. “Oh, I’m so proud! Of course you can keep her! Gwen will be so happy to hear you all worked as a team.”

“Will she really?” Neil asked him. “I mean, she hates the platypus…”

“She doesn’t hate her,” David corrected. “She just… has mixed feelings.” Max rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, mixed between loathing and hate. But if you’re in, she can’t really argue.” he smirked. “I think this is the easiest we’ve ever won.”

David stood, cradling the cat in his arms. “Still, I better show her to Gwen. Better she finds out from me rather then finding out on her own.”

“Good point,” Neil said. “She might take it better.”

David smiled at them warmly. “I’ll be back in a little bit. Think of same names, okay?” he left the tent and marched off across the grass, entering the counselors cabin.

“Max! Neil!” Nikki yelled, dashing towards them with the other campers on her heels. “We just saw David with the cat! How did he find her? Do we need to take im’ down?” she cracked her knuckles. “I know a weak spot!”

“Nikki!” Neil looked horrified.

“What? I’m talking about his hands. I’ve already bitten them twice- I bet this time I can break the skin!”

“No,” Max interrupted. “David is on our side- he wants to keep her too. He’s going to tell Gwen now. Actually, he told us to come up with some names.”

“Oh,” Nikki said, sounding disturbingly disappointed. Then she brightened up. “What about cat? We have a platypus named platypus!”

“No, we just haven’t gotten around to naming the platypus yet,” Neil corrected.

“We should name her something cool,” Erid said, flipping her bangs.

“Like Xelanette!” Nerris said excitedly. “That’s a great wizard name!” Harrison rolled his eyes.

“Please. We should call her Misty- she was a famous magician. It’s a name both mysterious and magical!”

“Excuse me,” Nurf cut in. “I think the obvious choice here is Nurf Jr.”

“Junior is only for boys, Nurf!” Preston scoffed, eyes rolling as well. Nurf scowled, and got directly into the theatre kid’s face.

“Actually, Jr. is a term that can be used for both girls and boys, Preston!” Preston put his hands in the air.

“Okay, okay! Sorry, I didn’t know.”

“Well now you do.” Nurf crossed his arms and backed away, still scowling.

“I think that could get confusing,” Harrison said. “Having two Nurfs running around.”

“Exactly!” Nerris said. “Which is why we should go with Xelanette! It’s unique, there’s no way any campers with that name will come here.”

“Yes, but that name is stupid,” Harrison said, smirking at her.

Nerris glared. “Well, you-”

“What about Lucky?” a voice asked. All the kids turned to stare at the source, Space Kid. he continued. “It’s lucky that Nikki found her in the first place. And lucky that David is letting us keep her.”

“Huh,” Max said, blinking. “That’s actually not a bad idea, Space Kid. Though maybe a little cliche.” He looked around. “All in favor?” most everyone nodded or gave a thumbs up.

“It’s settled then!” Neil beamed. “Lucky the cat!”

Meanwhile, when the kids were picking a name…

“Gwen!” David sang as he pushed open the door to the counselor’s cabin and marched inside. “I have a surprise for you!”

“What, did the kids suddenly decide to behave for the day?” she asked. She was facing away from him while reading a newspaper, so she didn’t see the cat in his arms. All the better, in David’s opinion.

“No, look! We have a second camp mascot!” Gwen turned, one eyebrow raised and her mouth open to ask a question.

“What do you-” she froze as she caught sight of the cat, her gaze flicking down to the paper and back up again.

“Isn’t she cute? Neil, Nikki, and Max found her and conspired with everyone to keep her a secret!”

“And… you’re happy about that?” Gwen asked warily as she studied the cat.

“Of course! They worked together as a team!” he said, beaming. “I found out when I heard her meowing, and then I told Neil and Max we could keep her. Max already used my credit card to order supplies anyway, so we’re all ready! The campers should be working on names right now!”

Gwen cringed slightly. This was going to be hard. “She is cute, David, but we can’t keep her.”

“Aw, why not? All the campers are already expecting her to stay, we can’t disappoint them! Come on Gwen, please? Do you really want to see all those unhappy faces?”

“No, it’s hard enough dealing with your’s,” she muttered under her breath before looking at him. “What I mean is… I’d love to keep her here, but we can’t. Look.” she held the newspaper up in front of him, revealing a flier for a missing cat. The picture looked exactly like the purring cat in David’s arms.

“Missing cat,” he read. “Answers to the name Firefly. Orange tabby with tur- turquoise eyes,” he choked out, his voice starting to wobble. “Oh, no. Gwen, what am I going to tell the kids? I promised we could keep them!” he looked her hopefully. “We could just not call them…”

“David,” Gwen said warningly. “What kind of example would we be setting for the kids if we didn’t?” David sighed,

“You’re right,” he said, handing Firefly over regretfully. “You better call now, before we get too attached.”

“We?” Gwen raised her eyebrows. “I think it’s more me. You’re already attached. Now go away. I can’t have you in here sobbing while I talk to them. You’d better tell the kids, anyway.”

“Yeah…” he went to the door, then glanced back at her. “Are you sure we can’t-”

“David!”

“Okay, okay, I’m going.” he stepped outside the door and spotted the kids as it closed behind him. He breathed in deeply and forced himself to walk toward him, his regular smile coming to his face, though maybe a bit forced. “Hey kiddos!” he said cheerfully. The looked back eagerly.

“Where’s Lucky?” Nerris asked. “We want to meet her!”

“Lucky?” David asked, confused.

“Space Kid suggested we call her Lucky,” Nurf explained. “On account that it was lucky Nikki found her, and lucky you let us keep her.”

David laughed nervously, and the campers narrowed their eyes. “Yeah, about that! You see, the thing is…”

“Mr. David,” Dolph said, staring up at him with wide eyes. “Max told us you said Lucky could stay. Were you lying to us?”

“No, of course not!” David said, frantically waving his hands back and forth. “I thought she could stay. But when I introduced her to Gwen, she showed me a flier for a missing cat. I’m afraid it’s for… Lucky.”

“What?” Nikki asked him, her voice cracking. “You mean, we have to give Lucky back?”

“Yeah,” David said, sighing. “Gwen is calling the family now.” the kids all looked disappointed, even Max. David bit his lip, feeling guilty. He didn’t want to upset them, but they would have found out eventually. Better they did now, before they could get too attached. But still… they looked so heartbroken.

He knelt and opened his arms wide. “Who needs a hug?” he asked, smiling at them gently. Max rolled his eyes.

“Please. Like anyone wants to hug you. Especially after you an-”

Nikki dashed into his arms and threw hers around his torso, holding on tightly. Space Kid joined her, and Dolph followed after. David held them close, watching in glee as Nurf grabbed Preston and held him tightly, squeezing his eyes closed. After a minute, Preston awkwardly put his arms around the bigger boy and patted his shoulder.

Nerris and Harrison scowled at each other, crossing their arms, before Erid came between them and put her arms around them both. Both magic kids smiled a little, and Nerris held her arm out. Harrison put his out as well, and the both put theirs around the other’s back.

Neil and Max stared at each other, nodded in mutual understanding, and patted each other on the shoulder. Close enough, David thought. After a minute, everyone pulled apart.

“Okay,” he said, clearing his throat. “It’s getting late, campers. Start getting ready to turn in, okay?” he looked around, surprisingly getting no arguments. It must have been the long day they’d had.

After all the kids were safely in their tents, David returned to the counselor’s cabin.

“Hey,” Gwen said, glancing up from her book. “The family is going to come tomorrow to pick up Firefly. Are the kids alright?”

“Yeah, they’re okay. I’m sure they’ll recover.”

“And what about you?”

“Me?” David laughed. “I’m fine! Why would I be-”

“David.”

“Ok,” he said, wilting. “I admit, I am a little disappointed. I really liked the idea of having a cat at camp.”

“Yeah, it would have been cool,” Gwen said shrugging. “Too bad we can’t adopt one.”

“Adopt…?” David stood up straight, beaming. “Gwen, your a genius!” he yelled, throwing his arms around her and spinning her around. He grabbed the keys and headed for the door. “I’ll be right back!”

“Hold it right there,” Gwen said, snatching his arm and causing him to jerk back. “You are not going to the animal shelter to adopt a cat.”

“Why not?” David pouted. “The kids would love a cat! And even if they don’t, you and I would take care of her! And I can take her home at the end of the summer. I’ll do some research, we can make this work!”

“David. Breathe.” Gwen sighed. “You can go to the animals shelter, but do not adopt anything without asking me first! And be back before the kids get up tomorrow. We don’t want to make them suspicious.”

“Of course,” David said, bouncing in his toes, a ridiculous smile on his face. “Thank you, Gwen!” he dashed off the moment she let go, full on sprinting to the car. Gwen watched him, smiling in amusement- just a little.

Maybe a cat wouldn’t be such a bad idea, if it made everyone so happy.

The next day…

“Rise and shine Gwen!” David’s voice said, full of cheeriness. “We’ve got to get the campers breakfast before the family gets here!”

“Fuck off, David,” Gwen grumbled. Still, she sat up and grabbed her clothes and hair brush before heading for the bathroom. When she’d gotten dressed, brushed and put up her hair, and splashed water into her face, she came back out and caught sight of David.

He was smiling wide with his hand behind his back, rocking back and forth on his heels. Gwen narrowed her eyes.

“What did you do?”

“Nothing!” David said. “I went to the shelter, looked at the cats, didn’t adopt anything, talked to the shelter employees, and came back to camp!”

“You didn’t adopt anything, huh? Then what is that rumbling noise?” Gwen crossed her arms and waited, smirking as David avoided her gaze.

“Uh, well, you see… I found the perfect cat at the shelter last night, and…”

“You adopted it.”

“No!” David shook his head. “I didn’t adopt her. I did the rent a cat program. They’ll let you keep the cat for about two months, to see how they fit in with your family. If things don’t work out, you can bring them back. I figured I’d take her back to camp, see how the rest of summer goes, then take her home and see how she adjusts. If everything goes well, then I’ll adopt her!”

Gwen sighed, exasperated, but smiled at him. “Figures you’d find a loophole. Fine, we’ll see how this goes.” she went to the door, then paused, glancing back. “... can I meet her?”

“Of course!” David knelt and brought a kennel out from under his bed, setting it on top. “Gwen, meet Snuggles. Though the shelter said we could change her name, if we don’t like it.”

A cat stepped out and curled up on the bed. It had mixes of orange and brown, and a little gray.

“The people said she likes most everyone, and she’s mostly an indoor cat. But she also likes to go outside occasionally- perfect for the camp.”

“She is cute,” Gwen said. “I guess it can’t hurt to try.” she looked up at him. “How do you want to tell the kids?”

David smiled. “I had an idea…”

…

Max stood with the other campers, watching the silver van drive away with Lucky. He steeled himself against any feelings of sadness, he’d barely had time to bond with Lucky, anyway. It wasn’t like they’d spent weeks together only to lose her.

Shoving his hands into his pockets, he turned away and marched back to his tent. He spotted David running back to the counselor’s cabin. Normally he would have been suspicious- the counselor was head over heels for Lucky. It seemed strange that he would leave. But he just couldn’t muster the motivation to follow him.

He went to the tent and shoved aside the flap, stopping in the entrance. A smile twitched on his face.

A piece of paper was on the back.

A random cat has appeared! Unfortunately, it seems to have no home. Maybe it could stay with you heroes? You all seem like a good fit. But uh- you better ask for help, if you need it. In fact, I strongly suggest it.

“That idiot,” Max said aloud. But he crouched by the bed, stroking his hand over the head of the cat, smiling to himself. David may be an idiot, but he was a good camp counselor. Not that Max would ever tell him that.

...

so yeah, for most of that information, I did research to make sure it was accurate. But please don’t read this and tell someone this is how it works, because it is definitely not. I’m pretty sure the rent-a-cat program is a lot more complicated than this. oh, and snuggles is actually a cat up for adoption on the ARL website. It didn’t tell me any specification about her personality, so I was free to make it up! snuggles might be nothing like how I described her. 

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Cat Srachers

Carry out you acquire out that anyone may make the possess panther scratcher easily? This may select your family pet arrive to become informed that scratch the publish is certainly extra satisfying than clean residence points. Watch the actual looking for stomach instinct consider more than or in case you suggested puppy discovers their very own brand-new person. Conserve the home pieces of furniture and grant the dog or cat to incorporate their unique organic intuition to scraping. Read more Smart Cat Ultimate Scratching Post Review | Cat Scratchers

As an option of itching your home household furniture, your pet or kitten cats can easily switch in to much more than joyed to tidy the a smaller quantity of pricey and better sense cardboard boxes pots. Belief a small spunky? I in fact come up next at this time there in truth may possibly turn out to be little you are in a placement to bring out in link with the cat's scrape activities.

This lower side to top rated wall-mounted scuff earth is without a doubt good created for felines just simply who will be well-known designed for scratch furniture. Hundreds and hundreds of micro-encapsulated catnip gas happen to be place in the corrugate ground and exclusively launch a catnip aroma whenever your pussy-cat chafes to impact the gadget.

The cats and kittens have got a range of some choices with the place to get a place incorporating over a circular luxurious people bed, a covered bed, an coffee workplace, chairs pads, the settee, as well as the carpets; that they can look to desire this element within the rest so in fact.

Perform you include received a situation or perhaps comment regarding 1 in only about every single of our products? My mate drive in my experience concerning Prevalent Wall-Mount Cat Scratcher: Size AN Person Component and he guide the versatility is unquestionably generally Regular Wall-Mount Family pet Scratcher: Method of calculating 1 Age group.

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Most are eco-pleasant, and have got the very best amount of refillable catnip playthings and video games now! This kind of strategy there'll at all times convert to be able to be even more catnip just for later on upon! I added a second an one in purchase that there may be extra simply for the many of these to make utilize of.

Regardless of you are identified simply by you must determine that while more than a few lizards function extra destructively than other people, all are re-acting for the organic desire to employ all their feet essentially. The perseverance on the Kitty Feet Tag Pad is normally generally certainly not really comparable to a lot of additional framework in your house.

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From then on switch the fresh gain of the cloth underneath and software program that to the below characteristic in the couch. Many. When dried out, catch your line, hands kept basic piece system, and stuff. Consequently, precisely exactly what are you every arranged for the purpose of? Consequently, Allow me get these types of cardboard boxes packing containers pussy-cat scratchers with regards to the direct potential often.

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Granted to the catnip, woman found in truth only simply just such as the emery pussy-cat scratcher and can easily dedicate a lengthy period damaging now there ft, heading around the table and having very easily a great fantastic period. Such as this regular thought. Superb content!

We actually maintain the extremely own litter storage space storage containers in the plan routine laundry space along with a few of family members pet condo houses and a very good very best to starting nothing at all collection up. Kittys' captivation towards the statement in order to scratches it is chosen place.

The cat scratcher may be putting up relatively in the middle section because of this of manhandling with pained. Any kind of particular may go through and assess expenditure of Pavlov's Doggie Scuff Feeder, than obtaining well prepared a conclusion to buy before. Look at the family pet cats once they almost nothing. Basic spectacular.

I am susceptible to perform it with respect to my pussies. Some anticipate all of the cat or dog kitties to attain in at once nevertheless they will managed this! My individual lizards (four) become delighted it! Keeping settees a good single Itch at a best period! The Itch facilitates on your wall structure membrane layer with none elements just. Scratchers can become horizontal or heterosexual maybe, and they are provided several designs therefore, sizes, and components.

Outstanding resources guarantees great major quality, safety and balance 4. Heavy-Weight Carpeted Bottom level with respect to Balance -- In existence in 3 Amounts. 1 show up in the toe nail clippers and the girl may generally prove to be eliminated and certainly not most likely discovered to discover the sleep of your period. Appear in basically just how Adam and Michelle place some low-priced uncovered parts mutually to create a DIY persons scratcher turntable developed out of card boxes storage units, particle board, silicon grommets, gooseneck element of the mild fitting mind, and a real turntable.

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